Category Archives: Culture

Catching up with friends

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On Sunday evening, we went to my inlaws place for haldi Kumkum and it was a fun evening. BB & GG got to meet up with some old friends whom they hardly see these days since they’ve moved away and are in different schools. At one point there was so much noise, we couldn’t hear ourselves talk – there were about 9 kiddos in the house, including two little ones. It was funny seeing how they split themselves gender-wise – the boys playing with their cars in one room and roaring with laughter at bodily functions, something that only little boys are capable of finding humour in and the girls playing god knows what but which included loads of shouting, dancing and singining in one room. The two little ones shuttled between both rooms, somtimes scared as they saw the noise levels there.

Image source - Wikipedia

It was really fun catching up with friends like this and we have decided to do it once again soon (after the exams). While talking about the different activities our kiddos do I was stuck by something. Most of their friends who came visiting on Sunday were learning Indian things (classical music, classical dance etc) since they learn they non-Indian things in school, something which every self-respecting tambrahmkid does, but BB & GG are different. BB & GG have been

Image from Wikipedia

learning Indian classical Carnatic music for about a year now and GG as a counterpoint to this has been learning Ballet since the time she was around three years old. She enjoys ballet, but is not very good at it. It’s not something that she’ll be doing as a career, but it is something that gives her pleasure. I enjoy this dischotomy and it gives me pleasure that GG is blending the traditional with the modern, just like this world that is all hers!

Now I have to get BB to take something that complements what GG is doing – but BB is alll boy and so I am unsure if he will enjoy it. Well, there’s always hope. Next year, when they go to Primary 3, they need to take up some compulsary Co-Curricular Activities. Since BB is always at home – on the iPhone, on the computer or on the TV, both S and me want him to take up some physical activity like soccor, wushu or chookball!

Little Girls…or Miniature Women?

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Ok, here’s a warning, rant coming on, so leave now if you want…

On Friday night, BB & GG had their music concert, which I wrote earlier. There I realised that most people found it very normal to put on make-up to their little girls – some as young as three and four!

My view about this is fairly straitforward – GG gets to wear make-up when she turns 15. If there are compeling reasons to wear make-up earlier, it will not be anytime before secondary school (13 or thereabouts) and then too it has be something very light – maybe lipgloss when she goes out. I am not discounting the odd make-up when is forced to wear it (like a performance in school etc), but in situations where it is not needed, I totally dislike it on young girls. According to me putting on chemicals on their faces now will lead to many problems later on in life. Also they are children, not miniature adults! Is there a need to make them look like adults so soon? Let them enjoy their childhood first. Are the parents even aware what is in the cosmetics that they are putting on their daughters? Have they read labels? This has the makings of their faces looking older than their real ages by the time they reach their mid-twenties. Even if the girls ask for it, isn’t it our jobs as parents to not let them do it?

The show on Friday was a very casual one with just the children who learn from this particular teacher and their parents. I saw girls with full make-up (by this I mean eyeshadow, eye liner, blush, lipstick and nail polish) while the others did variations of the theme. I think GG along with just 2-3 other girls was sans makeup at all. The colours used were the real dark colours like dark red and burgundy.

Another thing which gets my goat is the same young girls wearing shoes with heels. The same rule that applies for make-up applies for shoes for GG, although she has been longing for heels. When heels are said not be good even for adults, imagine what it would do to a young girl’s feet even before it has had a chance to fully grow!

Ok rant over, we can all go back to our lives now

What do you think about girls being allowed to wear make-up and heels before they should?

Nine Nights of Prayer, Dancing and Fun

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I really miss being in India during the festive season. Today is the start of the Navratri festival in India and everywhere there are Hindus. Navratri literally means nine nights and this festival, in honour of the various manifestations of the Goddess Durga or is celebrated with pomp and pagentry in different ways across the country. Everyday is dedicated to one form or aspect and the festival ends on the tenth day called Dusshera or Vijayadashami. Dusshera epitomises the victory of good over evil.

Goddess Durga and her various forms

Since almost all the festivals that Hindus celebrate go by the lunar calendar, Navratri is celebrated in the Hindu month of Ashwin, which corresponds to end September/early October every year. There is no definite date and the dates are determined every year based on the moon’s aspects.

Ramlila

While the whole country celebrates Navrati, the festival is celebrated in different ways throughout the country. In North India, people fast during the nine days and pray to the the various forms of Shakti by singing bhajans or devotional songs. The Ramayan is also performed during the nine days in Ramlila grounds with the tenth day reserved for the killing of the demon king Ravan. In the north they believe that the nine days of Navratri is the time Lord Ram battled with Ravan and it was on Dusshera that he killed him – hence the name Vijaydashami or the day of victory.

Dandiya Raas

In the state of Gujarat, Navratri is one of the biggest festivals celebrated. Here, a big statue of Durga is kept in communal areas and homes and every nights, everybody comes out to dance the garba and the dandiya raas. Nowadays the garba is rarely performed or if performed, it is done right at the begining and the rest of the time, it’s time for the dandiya. In Mumbai, the nine days is filled with people going to different dandiya grounds everyday and playing to their hearts content.

Image from Wikipedia - Durga Puja Pandal in West Bengal

In West Bengal, the last four days or Saptami, Ashtami, Navami and Dashami is the most important with the Pujos happening. Again like in Gujarat, there are big statues of Durga and communal praying and celebrations take place.

Golu

In South India, steps are created with golus which are dolls collected by the family and kept for the nine days. Married women and young girls are called home for haldi kumkum. It is said it is very auspicious to girl young girls (i.e. girls who have not yet started mensurating) gifts in the form clothes, bangles etc. In the south, the ninth day is also celebrated as Saraswati Puja where books and implements used for your profession are kept in front of the Goddess Saraswati, who is the Goddess of learning. We used to love this day as this was one day sanctioned by the scriptures where you should not study! The whole day the books are kept and on Dusshera, the books are taken out and then studied. In my family, we also wear new clothes on this day.

Image from Wikipedia - Jumbo Savari during celebrations in Mysore

In Mysore, Karnataka, the festival is celebrated with a lot of pomp and show and the Mysore Palace is especially lit up for the occasion.

The Navratri is divided into three parts of three days each. The first three days are devoted to Goddess Durga or Kali (the destroyer) and her different forms, the middle three days to Goddess Lakshmi (the provider) and her manifestations and the last three days to Goddess Saraswati (the giver of wisdom) and her various aspects.

The last day is Dusshera which is considered a very auspicious day to begin something new. Many parents who plan to put their children in school, have a small ceremony in the temple to start their formal learning process called Vidyarambham. We did this for BB & GG when they were around 2 years old. The ceremony had the parent use the index finger of the child to write an auspicious symbol (usually OM) so that that is the first thing they write.

So what will we be doing? Starting today, almost everyday GG & me (with BB tagging along) will visit family and friends for the Haldi Kumkum ritual. GG being a pre-meranche girl is high in demand and so I will take her wherever I go. On Friday BB & GG will be singing at a temple near our place along with their classical music teacher and friends. Then on Dusshera, we will go to the same classical music teacher’s place to pay our respects and start the second year of music studies! And in between all this is studies as this is exam season here!!