The Disappearing Art of Doing Nothing

Doing nothing sounds simple until one actually tries to do it.

Sit still. Put the phone away. Do not read. Do not scroll. Do not make a list. Do not mentally draft an email, plan the week, remember the groceries, check the blood sugar reader, open a book, play a game, rearrange a thought, or wonder whether this stillness can be turned into something useful later.

Just sit.

For some people, this may sound peaceful. For me, it sounds luxurious, desirable, and almost impossible. I like the idea of doing nothing. In theory, it is sitting in a quiet room, perhaps lying down, staring into space, letting the mind settle like dust after a cupboard has been opened. But in reality, my brain does not settle. My mind behaves as if twenty browser tabs are open and one of them is playing music, usually at 2 am when I have woken up to use the toilet and should, by all logic, return to sleep.

Doing nothing is hard for me. Even when my body is still, my mind is moving. If I have a few minutes with no obvious task, my hand automatically reaches for my phone. I check social media, open a game, read Reddit, or go into my library app because if a story has hooked me, even a lift ride can become reading time. I fill small silences before they have a chance to become silence.

I do not particularly like this. But it is also part of modern life, and pretending otherwise would be dishonest.

We live in a world that has trained us to treat every gap as an opportunity. Waiting for the kettle? Check the phone. Waiting for the bus? Check the phone. Eating alone? Watch something. Sitting in bed? Scroll. Resting? Optimise the rest. Record the rest. Turn the rest into a morning routine, a Sunday reset, a wellness ritual, a slow-living aesthetic with soft lighting and a ceramic mug placed just so.

Even doing nothing, it seems, now has to work for its keep.

There is an irony in watching videos about slow living and self-care, knowing how much work must have gone into making them. The lighting, the camera angles, the editing, the captions, the music, the deliberate casualness of it all. Rest has become content. Stillness has become performance. The person filming their peaceful morning has probably spent more time arranging the shot than being peaceful.

I say this without judgment because I, too, enjoy watching such content. It is soothing in the way a clean kitchen in someone else’s house is soothing. But it also makes me laugh a little. We have become so uncomfortable with unproductive time that even leisure must be packaged, captioned, and posted.

This is perhaps why the art of doing nothing is disappearing. Not because we no longer desire it, but because we no longer know how to defend it.

As children, we had more empty time, whether we liked it or not. Growing up in Mumbai, I hated being bored. If I complained to my paternal grandmother that I was bored, she had a line in Tamil that sounded far better than any translation could manage. If I said, “Bore adikkaradu,” she would say, “Bore-a adi,” meaning “beat the boredom back”. In other words, boredom was not a crisis requiring adult intervention. It was something to be wrestled with, survived, and transformed.

Source

And we did transform it.

We read anything we could find. We invented games. We produced little plays. We pretended. We made things up. We stood on balconies and watched the world go by. I loved doing that, standing on the balcony and observing the street below. People walking, vehicles passing, neighbours talking, vendors calling out, the ordinary theatre of city life continuing whether or not one had anything to do.

There was a kind of richness in that unstructured look. No one called it mindfulness then. No one had to. It was simply what one did when there was nothing else to do.

I also daydreamed, especially at night when I could not sleep. I still do sometimes, though less often in the day now. Adult life has a way of shrinking the room available for aimless imagination. Daydreaming becomes something we squeeze between responsibilities or something that arrives only when sleep refuses to.

Children today have less of this empty time. BB and GG’s childhood still had some creativity in it. They played with dolls, board games, blocks, and toys. They were not exposed to social media very early. But once school, tuition, enrichment classes, and devices entered the picture, childhood became more scheduled. This is not unique to them. It is the rhythm of many children’s lives now: school, homework, tuition, activities, screens, repeat.

Some structure is good. Children need encouragement, discipline, and exposure. A little pressure can help them grow. But beyond a point, childhood becomes a calendar rather than a landscape. There is no time to wander. No time to invent a game out of nothing. No time to sit with boredom long enough for it to turn into imagination.

And boredom does have a purpose. It is not merely the absence of entertainment. It is where children meet themselves. It is where they learn to create, observe, wait, and think. If every moment is filled for them, they never discover what their own minds can do when left alone.

Of course, adults are not much better.

Singapore, where I live now, is a difficult place in which to do nothing. It is efficient, achievement-driven, scheduled, expensive, and always moving. There is always something to do, and often something that should have been done yesterday. Planning is rewarded. Productivity is admired. The calendar is a survival tool. Even leisure is often organised in advance.

There are still places where I can zone out. At home, when the house is quiet. At the beach or in a park. In the library. On the upper deck of a bus, sitting by the window, watching the city move past. At the airport, oddly enough, especially when I am alone. Airports are perfect places for doing nothing because everyone is between places. No one fully belongs there for long. You can sit, watch people, imagine stories, and feel suspended from ordinary time. A long-haul flight offers something similar. Once the plane takes off, life below has to wait. No errands. No chores. No immediate demands. Just time, air, and a small screen one may or may not use.

India offers a different relationship with doing nothing. The India I grew up in was noisy, crowded, and full of constant cacophony, so doing nothing was never exactly quiet. But there were natural pauses, partly because life was less efficient. Waiting was built into the day. Waiting for buses, trains, relatives, phone calls, water, electricity, and information. Power cuts forced everyone to stop. Train journeys made one look out of the window. Neighbours dropped in. People sat around. Balconies, building compounds, and street corners became informal theatres of nothing in particular.

Now, when I go to Bangalore, I still find pockets of time to zone out. But India too has changed. Everyone has a smartphone. Everyone has internet. The pause has been colonised. Whether in India or Singapore, the hand goes to the phone. The old art of sitting and doing nothing has been replaced by the new habit of sitting and consuming something.

The phone may be the greatest enemy of nothingness. It is useful, addictive, entertaining, and always available. It rescues us from boredom so quickly that we no longer learn what boredom might have given us. It makes waiting painless but also makes thinking rarer. It connects us to everyone and disconnects us from the quiet inside ourselves.

This matters because doing nothing is not always nothing.

For a writer, especially, empty time is not wasted time. Ideas often arrive when I am not chasing them. During my morning walk with my meditation app. In the shower. While cooking. Before sleep. While drinking coffee. Sometimes in the most random places and moments. Writing needs empty space. It needs the mind to loosen its grip on usefulness. It needs time when nothing obvious is being produced, because below the surface, something is forming.

I do not usually mistake thinking time for laziness. I know that thought is part of writing. But knowing this does not always remove the guilt. When life has so many moving parts: job searching, writing, income streams, blog work, Echoes of Calm, family, health, Image Mission work, there is always something that could be done. One more application. One more article. One more Canva template. One more email. One more plan. One more post. One more idea to capture before it disappears.

In such a life, doing nothing can feel irresponsible.

This is where productivity culture becomes dangerous. It teaches us that every moment must justify itself. Rest must improve performance. Hobbies must become income streams. Walking must count as fitness. Reading must contribute to growth. Writing must build a platform. Creativity must be monetised. Even a blog, which may begin as a personal space for reflection, memory, and expression, is quickly assessed through the lens of money.

For years after I started blogging, when I told people about it, I was often asked whether it made money. The question came so frequently that I eventually had to shut it down firmly. Not everything has to earn. Not every joy has to be converted into income. Not every act of expression must be weighed on the scale of productivity.

Yet I understand why people ask. We live in a world where time is money, and therefore time spent without earning, improving, networking, or producing appears suspect. Doing nothing becomes not merely a personal failure but an economic one. What did you get out of it? What did it lead to? How did it help?

Maybe it helped me remain human. That should be enough, though it often is not accepted as an answer.

Women, in particular, are rarely allowed to do nothing without judgment. A man resting is often simply resting. A woman resting is available. If she is sitting down, surely she can fold the laundry. If she has a free hour, surely she can cook something extra, organise a cupboard, call someone, supervise homework, plan a meal, reply to messages, soothe a feeling, remember an appointment, or be useful in some way.

Women are expected to fill empty space. Cooking, cleaning, organising, remembering, caring, planning, messaging, hosting, helping. Even rest can become a waiting room for the next task.

In some families, if a woman has free time, it must be explained. She cannot just sit. She must be tired, sick, upset, or lazy. Simple rest is not enough justification. This is one of the quiet injustices of domestic life. Women’s time is often treated as communal property. Everyone may draw from it. Everyone may assume it is available.

Motherhood deepens this. When BB and GG were young, I barely had time to myself. Later, as they grew older, I reclaimed more of it, but until they finished school, there was always an undercurrent of alertness. Meals, schoolwork, activities, health, logistics, emotional needs, exam schedules, transport, forms, uniforms, tuition, everything. Even when I was not actively doing something, some part of me was on standby.

That standby mode does not switch off easily. Even now, doing nothing can feel slightly suspicious, as though someone somewhere must need something.

This is why chosen stillness feels so different from forced waiting. There is a kind of nothing that is peaceful: morning coffee in a silent house, a walk without hurry, sitting at a window, watching rain. But there is also a kind of nothing that is anxious and unpleasant: waiting when there is too much work, waiting for replies, waiting for results, waiting in uncertainty, waiting while the mind chews through every possible outcome.

Chosen stillness restores. Forced waiting drains.

This distinction matters because not everyone has the privilege to romanticise doing nothing. For someone juggling multiple jobs, caregiving, financial stress, illness, or survival, rest may not be easily available. Telling people to “slow down” can sound tone-deaf when their lives do not allow it. The issue is not simply individual choice. It is also social, economic, and cultural. Some people are not restless because they lack wisdom. They are restless because life demands it.

Still, within whatever space we have, however small, we need moments that are not claimed by productivity.

Health has taught me this in its own way. Managing diabetes means paying attention to the body, even when the mind wants to keep charging ahead. I use a CGM, and scanning it is itself a morning ritual. I know that being more rested helps me manage my blood sugar better. Stress, sleep, food, movement, and rest are all connected. The body keeps its own accounts, whether or not we acknowledge them.

Perhaps doing nothing is not nothing to the body. Perhaps it is repair.

The trouble is, I am not always listening closely enough to hear that. Like many people, I wait for the body to speak loudly before I pay attention. Fatigue must become exhaustion. Stress must become numbers on a screen. The mind must become too noisy to ignore. Only then do I pause, when pausing should have come much earlier.

Midlife adds another layer. As I grow older, I feel both more entitled to rest and more anxious about time. Doing nothing can feel like reclaiming time, but it can also feel like wasting it. The years no longer stretch endlessly ahead in the way they seemed to when I was young. There is a sharper awareness now that time is finite. This can make rest feel precious, but also make it feel dangerous. What am I doing with my life? What am I not doing? What should I have done by now?

Midlife asks uncomfortable questions. One of them is: what am I rushing toward, exactly?

We hurry through days as though there will be a final clearing where everything is done and rest becomes permissible. But that clearing never arrives. There is always another task, another worry, another plan. If rest has to be earned by finishing everything, we will never rest. The list is immortal. We are not.

Perhaps the art of doing nothing disappeared because the world prioritises busyness. Busy people look important. Busy lives look successful. Busy calendars suggest demand and relevance. To say “I am busy” is almost a badge of honour. To say “I did nothing” feels like a confession.

But what are we losing when we lose the ability to do nothing?

We lose imagination. We lose patience. We lose the ability to observe without needing to capture. We lose the inner life that grows only in quiet. We lose boredom, and with it the strange creativity boredom can unlock. We lose the ability to be alone with ourselves. We lose reflection. We lose the habit of noticing beauty when it is not presented to us through a screen.

We also lose a certain tenderness towards time. Not all time has to be used. Some time can simply be lived.

I admire people who still seem able to do this. Older people sitting at void decks, shooting the breeze with no visible agenda. Temple-goers sitting quietly after darshan, not rushing out immediately after the ritual is done. Children staring into space. People sitting in parks. Someone with a cup of tea and nowhere urgent to be. These scenes stay with me because they feel increasingly rare. They are small acts of resistance against a world that asks, “What next?”

My ideal version of doing nothing is simple. Morning. I am the only one awake in the house. The room is quiet. I have a hot cup of coffee in my hand. My phone is nearby, not for scrolling, but to capture an idea if one arrives. I sit in silence. No one needs me yet. The day has not begun making its claims.

This is not dramatic. It will never trend. It cannot be turned into a productivity hack without ruining it. That is precisely why it matters.

Doing nothing does not mean abandoning responsibility. It does not mean laziness, though a part of me still carries that old conditioning. “Don’t waste time.” “Do something useful.” “Idle mind is the devil’s workshop.” “Why are you just sitting?” These phrases were common enough growing up, and I have used versions of them with BB and GG too. The inheritance continues even when we know better. We pass on not only values but anxieties.

Maybe the work now is to interrupt that inheritance.

To tell ourselves and our children that empty time is not wasted time. That rest need not be earned through exhaustion. That boredom will not destroy us. That creativity requires space. That the mind needs to wander. That the body needs to repair. That a woman sitting down is not automatically available. That a hobby does not have to become a side hustle. That not every moment must be captured, posted, measured, or improved.

The art of doing nothing is disappearing, but perhaps it is not gone. It waits in small places. In morning coffee. In a bus window. In the hush of a library. In a beach breeze. In the airport between flights. In a quiet walk. In the few minutes after lighting a lamp. In the pause after prayer. In the space before an idea becomes words.

Maybe doing nothing is not the opposite of living fully. Maybe it is what allows us to live fully.

So tomorrow morning, if the house is still quiet and the day has not yet rushed in, I hope to sit with my coffee for a few minutes longer. I will probably still reach for my phone. I am not pretending to be a saint of stillness. But perhaps I can wait before touching it. Perhaps I can let the silence arrive first. Perhaps I can allow my mind to wander without immediately making it useful.

A few minutes of nothing. Which, I am beginning to realise, may be something after all.

2026 Week 42 Update

This week’s quote is by Canadian mindfulness teacher, meditation guide, writer and storyteller, widely known for her work with the meditation app Calm, Tamara Levitt. In this quote, Levitt beautifully captures the essence of what it means to connect with another human being. Empathy is not simply understanding someone’s circumstances or feeling sorry for them. It is the willingness to step outside our own experiences and make room for another person’s emotions, even when we cannot fully comprehend what they are going through. Often, when someone shares their struggles, our instinct is to offer advice, suggest solutions or reassure them that everything will eventually be fine. While these responses usually come from a place of kindness, they may not always be what the person needs. Sometimes, the greatest gift we can offer is our presence. To listen without judgement, acknowledge their feelings and allow them to express themselves without immediately trying to make things better.

Empathy also requires us to recognise that another person’s experience may be very different from our own. We do not have to agree with every decision they make or have experienced the same difficulties to respect what they are feeling. It is about meeting people where they are rather than expecting them to see the world through our eyes. Importantly, feeling with someone does not mean carrying all their pain as our own. Healthy empathy allows us to remain compassionate while maintaining our emotional boundaries. Perhaps the most meaningful part of empathy is its simplicity. We may not have the answers or the power to change someone’s circumstances, but we can remind them that they do not have to face everything alone.

Some weeks seem determined to remind me that even the best-laid plans must occasionally surrender to circumstances beyond my control. This was one of them. With October gathering pace, there was plenty to keep me occupied. Work continued its steady march towards important milestones, with details to finalise, conversations to navigate and decisions that needed attention. There is something satisfying about watching months of planning gradually become reality, although the closer things get to completion, the more those little unfinished details seem to multiply!

At the same time, I found myself thinking about transitions, both the ones happening around me and those I am quietly preparing for. Change can be exciting and unsettling in equal measure, particularly when the next chapter hasn’t quite revealed itself. And as if the usual uncertainties weren’t enough, the haze decided to make its presence felt across Singapore. The grey skies, unpleasant air and constant checking of air-quality readings have made even ordinary activities unnecessarily complicated. Outdoor plans have been disrupted, familiar routines reconsidered, and everyone seems to be waiting for the day we can breathe comfortably again. It is remarkable how something as simple as fresh air becomes precious when it is no longer guaranteed.

Perhaps this week’s lesson is about making room for what I cannot control without allowing it to overwhelm everything I can. The skies may be hazy, and parts of the future may be equally unclear, but there is still work to be done, joy to be found and life to be lived. And hopefully, clearer skies ahead.

In this week’s verse from the Bhagavad Gita, verse 17.16 speaks of austerity. When people hear the word austerity, they often think of physical discipline. Krishna offers a different definition. Mental discipline matters just as much. A calm mind, gentle speech and pure intentions require constant practice. This verse reminds us that spiritual maturity is not measured by appearances. It is reflected in how we think, how we speak and how we treat others when no one is watching.

Falling apart is ugly and excruciating. There are tears, anger, and hopelessness. But even amidst all of that, there is hope, light, and balance. This state of vulnerability can become the foundation for a new chapter in your life that makes room for new gifts and enriching experiences. Even in the darkest seasons, light can be found in the most unexpected places. Sometimes, that light is reflected in the smallest choices you make each day; choosing to get out of bed, taking a deep breath while you cry, or simply holding on to the belief that tomorrow can be better. Hold on to the truth that your pure being, despite everything it has endured, is still capable of feeling, loving, and beginning again.

So to those in Singapore and the region, stay home, stay safe if you are going outside and hopefully we see clearer skies very soon!

In My Hands Today…

The Notebook: A History of Thinking on Paper – Roland Allen

The first history of the notebook, a simple invention that changed the way the world thinks.

We see notebooks everywhere we go. But where did this simple invention come from? How did they revolutionise our lives, and why are they such powerful tools for creativity? And how can using a notebook help you change the way you think?

In this wide-ranging story, Roland Allen reveals all the answers. Ranging from the bustling markets of medieval Florence to the quiet studies of our greatest thinkers, he follows a trail of dazzling ideas, revealing how the notebook became our most dependable and versatile tool for creative thinking. He tells the notebook stories of artists like Leonardo and Frida Kahlo, scientists from Isaac Newton to Marie Curie, and writers from Chaucer to Henry James. We watch Darwin developing his theory of evolution in tiny pocketbooks, see Agatha Christie plotting a hundred murders in scrappy exercise books, and learn how Bruce Chatwin unwittingly inspired the creation of the Moleskine.

On the way we meet a host of cooks, kings, sailors, fishermen, musicians, engineers, politicians, adventurers and mathematicians, who all used their notebooks as a space for thinking and to shape the modern world.

In an age of AI and digital overload, the humble notebook is more relevant than ever.

Allen shows how bullet points can combat ADHD, journals can ease PTSD, and patient diaries soften the trauma of reawakening from coma. The everyday act of moving a pen across paper can have profound consequences, changing the way we think and making us more creative, more productive — and happier.

Sacred Stones, Spaces, and Stories: Divya Desams Part 28

Thiru Parameswara Vinnagaram Temple, Kanchipuram, Tamil Nadu
Moving away from Kanchipuram town and its tightly clustered Divya Desams, Thiruputkuzhi feels quieter and more open, but no less important. This temple, dedicated to Vijayaraghava Perumal and Maragathavalli Thayar, stands in a place shaped by grief, loyalty and dignity. It is one of those temples where the central story is not only about Vishnu in his divine majesty, but about what happens when the divine pauses for sorrow. Thiruputkuzhi is tied to the Ramayana, and more specifically to the death of Jatayu, the great bird who gave everything he had trying to save Sita. That alone gives the temple a different emotional tone. It is not mainly a temple of victory, though the Lord here is called Vijayaraghava. It is a temple of compassion shown in the middle of loss. In that sense, it feels deeply human.

The core legend of Thiruputkuzhi begins at one of the most painful moments in the Ramayana. When Ravana abducted Sita and carried her away, Jatayu, old and weakened by age, still rose to stop him. He fought not because he expected to win, but because it was the right thing to do. He could not simply watch wrongdoing and remain still. Ravana cut off his wings and left him mortally wounded. Later, as Rama and Lakshmana searched desperately for Sita, they found Jatayu lying on the ground. With his last breath, he told Rama what had happened. The story could have ended there, with the death of a loyal ally in the wilderness. But it does not. Rama, recognising Jatayu’s sacrifice, performed the bird’s last rites with the honour due to a father. That act is what gives Thiruputkuzhi its heart. The Lord did not move on quickly. He stopped. He mourned. He honoured courage.

That moment shapes the identity of the deity here. Vijayaraghava Perumal is understood as Rama in a form touched by grief and compassion. In the sanctum, the Lord is shown in seated posture, and temple tradition remembers him as the one who granted moksha to Jatayu and performed the final rites himself. There is also a striking local detail connected with the iconography. Sridevi and Bhudevi, who usually appear in a familiar arrangement on either side of the Lord, are said here to be positioned differently, reflecting the sadness of the moment. That detail matters because it shows how deeply the temple’s mood has been built around this episode. The central feeling here is not triumph after battle. It is tenderness after sacrifice. The divine is not distant from death and grief. It enters them and gives them dignity.

The name Thiruputkuzhi itself is linked to the legend. One common explanation is that Jatayu belonged to the pul or bird lineage, and that he was laid to rest in a kuzhi, meaning pit or burial place, which over time became Thiruputkuzhi. Whether one takes this as strict etymology or devotional memory, the meaning is clear enough. This is a place where sacrifice was not forgotten. That memory stays with the site even now. The temple tank is often associated with Jatayu and his final moments, and the entire landscape feels shaped by that single act of honouring the fallen.

Historically, Thiruputkuzhi carries traces of several periods of Tamil temple building. The temple is generally associated with Pandya beginnings, while later Chola inscriptions and Nayak contributions point to ongoing additions and restoration over time. Like many South Indian temples, it was not built in one moment and left untouched. It grew through patronage, memory and repeated acts of repair. The structure seen today reflects that continuity. There is a five-tiered rajagopuram, granite walls enclosing the temple, and a layout that is recognisably Dravidian without feeling excessive. The scale is dignified rather than overwhelming. It suits the story. This is not a temple that needs grandeur to make its point. Its power lies in the emotion carried by the sanctum.

Architecturally, the temple has a quiet balance to it. The main shrine houses Vijayaraghava Perumal in seated form, and there is a separate shrine for Maragathavalli Thayar. There is also a shrine for Ramanuja, which adds another layer of significance to the site, because the temple is linked in local memory with his early years of study. Thiruputkuzhi is also associated with Yadava Prakasa, Ramanuja’s teacher, which means the temple belongs not only to epic memory but also to the history of Sri Vaishnavite thought. This is one of those places where literary tradition, philosophical history and devotional practice overlap quietly without competing with one another.

The daily worship at Thiruputkuzhi follows the established Vaishnavite rhythm, with multiple pujas performed through the day. The temple observes six daily rituals, and major festivals include Brahmotsavam in the month of Masi, Theppotsavam in the month of Thai, Pavitrotsavam in the month of Avani, and Vaikuntha Ekadasi in Margazhi. These observances keep the temple rooted in living practice. It is not just remembered because of one Ramayana episode. It continues because people still come, still pray, still fold that old story into present-day lives. There is also a local practice connected with fertility and blessing, where women seek the grace of Maragathavalli Thayar with hope and faith. That, too, tells you something about how temples live. Their meanings expand beyond mythology and settle into everyday longing.

The pilgrimage experience at Thiruputkuzhi feels slower than in bigger temple towns. The temple lies a little away from the dense sacred clustering of Kanchipuram, and that distance helps its mood. You arrive not into noise, but into space. The village setting and the relative quiet around the temple allow the Ramayana story to sit more heavily in the mind. Standing before Vijayaraghava Perumal, one does not think first of kingship or cosmic acts. One thinks of loyalty, loss and the strange nobility of Jatayu’s final fight. Something is moving about a temple built around a being who did not “win” in any worldly sense, but who acted with complete moral courage. The temple preserves that kind of victory, which is deeper and harder to forget.

Culturally, Thiruputkuzhi has held its place through the hymns of Thirumangai Alvar, who sang of the temple and ensured its place in the Divya Desam tradition. Later acharyas also strengthened their standing. Vedanta Desika is associated with the temple through hymns and lineage memory, and the broader Sri Vaishnavite world has long treated Thiruputkuzhi as a site of both devotion and learning. This matters because the temple is not only a local shrine tied to a moving story. It is part of a much wider spiritual map in which memory, theology and poetry sustain one another.

What makes Thiruputkuzhi stand out in the Divya Desam journey is the kind of divinity it presents. In some temples, the Lord protects. In some, he teaches. In some, he measures the worlds, grants clarity or rests in yogic calm. Here, he grieves without losing dignity. He performs the duty that love demands. He honours the fallen with his own hands. That is why the temple lingers in the mind. It suggests that compassion is not secondary to divinity. It is central to it.

Thiruputkuzhi ultimately represents a form of grace that takes sorrow seriously. Vijayaraghava Perumal is not remote from suffering here. He responds to it, honours it and transforms it. Jatayu’s story gives the temple its emotional centre, but the larger lesson extends beyond the Ramayana. Courage is not always successful in visible terms. Loyalty is not always rewarded with survival. And yet neither is wasted. The temple says, quietly but firmly, that nothing offered in truth is lost. In the wider Divya Desam journey, Thiruputkuzhi stands as a temple of remembrance, dignity and the kind of compassion that stops long enough to perform the final rites.

Thiruputkuzhi Temple, Thiruputkuzhi, Tamil Nadu
Thirunindravur, near present-day Chennai in Tamil Nadu, is one of those Divya Desams whose story begins not with conquest or spectacle, but with a quiet act of staying. The presiding deity here is Bhaktavatsala Perumal, and the goddess is Sudhavalli Thayar, who is also remembered in local tradition as Ennai Petra Thayar, the Mother who claimed me as her own. The name Thirunindravur is often understood through that central image of the goddess standing her ground. Nindra means stood, and the place is remembered as the sacred spot where she remained. That already tells you something about the mood of the temple. This is not a shrine built around speed, force or dramatic intervention. It is built around relationship, hurt, reconciliation and the kind of devotion that does not walk away easily.

The core legend of the temple is tied to Varuna, the god of the waters, and to his daughter. According to temple tradition, Sudhavalli was born as the daughter of the oceanic powers and was married to Vishnu. At some point, a disagreement arose between her and her father, and in that moment of emotional rupture, she chose not to return with him. Instead, she remained at this place. Because she stood here and made it her own, the place came to be known as Thirunindravur. The emotional centre of the story is not anger in the usual sense. It is dignity. The goddess does not disappear into silence. She remains, and her staying transforms the place into sacred ground. Varuna, burdened by regret, later came here to seek forgiveness and to worship Vishnu. The Lord responded with grace, and that act of response gave him the name Bhaktavatsala, the one who is deeply affectionate toward his devotees. Tradition remembers the site as the place where Varuna worshipped Vishnu, and that memory remains one of the temple’s defining features.

That legend gives Thirunindravur its deeper tone. The temple is not simply about a god granting blessings. It is about what happens when hurt is acknowledged and healing is allowed to take shape. Sudhavalli Thayar is central here, not secondary. Her presence changes the way the temple is experienced. Even the title Ennai Petra Thayar carries unusual warmth. It suggests not just divine motherhood in the abstract, but a personal claiming. She is not only the goddess of the temple. She is the mother who says, in effect, ” “You are mine”. That emotional intimacy gives the shrine a softness that stays in the mind. Bhaktavatsala Perumal, in turn, is not mainly remembered here as a cosmic ruler or warrior. He is the Lord who receives the devotion of those who come with sincerity and responds with tenderness rather than distance.

Historically, Thirunindravur belongs to the older sacred map of northern Tamil Nadu. The temple is a recognised Divya Desam praised by Thirumangai Alvar, and that alone places it firmly within the early Vaishnavite devotional tradition. The site likely took shape under the broad influence of the Pallavas and later the Cholas, whose patronage helped establish many Vishnu temples in this region. Like many temples that remain active over long stretches of time, it was not built all at once and left untouched. It grew by stages, through donations, renovations and local care. Today, the temple is administered under the Tamil Nadu Hindu Religious and Charitable Endowments system, and tradition also connects it in practical stewardship to the Pedda Jeeyar of Tirupati as permanent trustee, which adds another layer to its continuing religious life.

Architecturally, the temple does not depend on excess to make an impression. The structure follows the familiar Dravidian pattern, with a gopuram, enclosed prakarams and the usual progression inward toward the sanctum. The mood, however, is gentler than grand. Bhaktavatsala Perumal stands in the sanctum in a composed posture, holding the conch and discus. The form is stately, but not severe. The very name of the deity shapes how one sees the image. This is the Lord who loves his devotees, so the visual presence of the idol feels welcoming rather than distant. Sudhavalli Thayar’s shrine deepens that atmosphere. In many temples, the goddess’s shrine offers emotional balance, but here she feels even more central because of the legend that explains the temple’s name. Her staying is what gives the place its memory. Her presence is not merely an accompaniment to the Lord’s. It is one half of the temple’s meaning.

There is also a striking image of Hanuman in the temple, shown carrying Rama and Lakshmana on his shoulders. That detail may seem small, but it adds another note to the shrine’s devotional world. Hanuman, the bearer and servant, fits naturally within a temple dedicated to loving devotion. Service, loyalty and emotional closeness are not side themes here. They are everywhere, woven into the temple’s visual and ritual life.

The ritual life of the temple remains active and structured. The temple follows the Tenkalai tradition of Sri Vaishnavism and the Pancharatra mode of worship. Daily pujas are performed six times a day, from the morning through the night, with each service including decoration, food offering and the waving of lamps for both Bhaktavatsala Perumal and Sudhavalli Thayar. As in many Tamil Vishnu temples, the soundscape matters too. During worship, the nagaswaram and tavil accompany the ritual atmosphere, while Vedic recitations continue the old liturgical rhythm. Weekly, fortnightly and monthly observances are also maintained, which tells you that this is not a temple remembered only because of its literary importance. It is still very much lived in through worship.

Its festivals also reflect that continuity. The temple’s important celebrations include Chitra Pournami, Tiruadyana Utsavam in Margazhi and Brahmotsavam in Panguni. Other observances such as Sri Jayanthi, Navaratri, Vijayadasami, Deepavali, Makara Sankranti, Thai Pongal, Ratha Saptami, Masi Magam and Vaikunta Ekadasi keep the temple firmly woven into the seasonal religious life of the community. Dinamalar’s temple record also notes Panguni Tiruvonam as an important festival date, along with celebrations connected to acharyas and Alvars. This range of observances matters because it shows the temple is not frozen inside one legend. It continues to meet the year as it unfolds, carrying old meanings into present time.

The pilgrimage experience at Thirunindravur has its own pace. Unlike the tightly packed temple clusters of Kanchipuram, this shrine feels a little more open in its setting, even though it lies within a growing urban region. Pilgrims often come here as part of a northern Tamil Nadu Divya Desam route, but the mood shifts once one enters the temple. The story invites inwardness. One thinks less about spectacle and more about relationships: between parent and child, between devotee and Lord, between hurt and forgiveness, between staying and returning. That is one reason the temple stays in memory. It carries a domestic emotional truth inside a sacred frame. The divine world here does not feel abstract. It feels recognisably human in its emotional texture, and that makes the grace of the place more accessible, not less.

Culturally, Thirunindravur holds its place because of Thirumangai Alvar’s praise and because the temple embodies a devotional value that runs deep in Tamil Vaishnavism: the Lord’s affection for the devotee. Bhaktavatsala is not just a name. It is a theological statement. In this shrine, devotion is not transactional. The devotee is not one more supplicant in a queue. The relationship is warm, almost familial. That is why the temple’s goddess being remembered as Ennai Petra Thayar matters so much. Together, the Lord who loves the devotee and the Mother who claims the devotee create a complete emotional world.

In modern terms, the temple continues to draw both local worshippers and pilgrims following the Divya Desam circuit. Its management remains active, the festivals continue, and the rituals have not lapsed into museum-like formality. The temple still functions as a living sacred space. For a visitor today, especially one used to temples framed mainly through architecture or tourist significance, Thirunindravur offers something different. It reminds you that the emotional idea behind a shrine can be stronger than sheer scale.

Thirunindravur ultimately represents the kind of grace that grows through a relationship. Sudhavalli Thayar stays, and that act of staying becomes a sacred memory. Varuna returns in repentance, and that return becomes part of the temple’s healing story. Bhaktavatsala Perumal receives devotion with affection, not distance, and that becomes the temple’s spiritual centre. In the wider Divya Desam journey, this shrine adds something deeply tender. It reminds us that divine love is not always revealed in miracles or cosmic acts. Sometimes it appears in the simple fact that someone stays, someone returns, and someone is received with grace.

In My Hands Today…

The Psychology of Stupidity – edited by Jean-François Marmion, translated by Liesl Schillinger

Stupidity is all around us. But in order to vanquish it, we must first understand it. In The Psychology of Stupidity, some of the world’s leading psychologists and thinkers—including a Nobel Prize winner and bestselling authors—discuss in articles, essays and interviews

  • Why smart people sometimes believe in utter nonsense;
  • How our lazy brains cause us to make the wrong decisions;
  • Why trying to debate fools is a trap;
  • How media manipulation and Internet overstimulation make us dumber;
  • Why the stupidest people don’t think they’re stupid.