For some wierd reason I feel like posting on neighbours, so please bear with me.
Housing in Singapore is of two very distinct types – public and private. We live in a Housing & Development Board (HDB) Executive Apartment type of flat. It’s not too bad and around 80% of people in Singapore live in these kinds of flats. Our previous home was also an HDB flat and when we wanted to move to a bigger flat, we decided to go to HDB again since we had not taken the subsidy they give locals and so wanted to use that before we move to private housing.
We’ve lived in our present home for the past year and a half and till today I barely know our neighbours. The block we live in is in an L shaped arrangement with the longer side having around 7 duplex type of flats and three in the shorter side (including ours) which are all on one level.
The day we shifted, we met the other two neighbours on our side of the building. They seemed nice and we exchanged hellos when we met or when the doors opened. Then one of them moved away (we didn’t know as we were on a holiday and when we came back, the neighbour was gone!). As for the others on the floor, we do not know ANY OF THEM! Funny right?
At our previous place, since I was working full-time, we also had a hello-bye relationship with our neighbours (there were a total of 6 flats on our floor including ours). But as soon as BB & GG were born, we became very friendly with them and the 6 years we spent there after the children’s birth were fun!
Contrast this with my home in Mumbai. We live in a building with 19 flats and almost all have been there for as long our family has been there (give or take around 60 years, the age of the building). I’ve grown up there and know every single person in the building. There was no fear of the unknown and all the adults living there were surrogate uncles/aunties/grandmas and grandpas! When we were younger and my parents had to go out for the evening, we used to go to one of these neighbours homes and if it became late, even slept over and came back home in the morning. When my grandparents passed away and my parents had to go to the city they were living in, it was to this particular uncle/aunty’s care that my mom left us in. She would bring us food and make sure we went to college and later to work. It didn’t matter to them that we were adults by then, my parents had left me and my sister in their care and they were going to look after us, come what may!
I miss that sense of camaraderie that we had, here it feels like every one just lives their own lives and noone is interested in the other person’s life. But then if I want to be really honest, I am also more of a self contained person and prefer my own company and that of my family’s to others…So guess this is quid pro quid…
Memories and Such 
Well, Singapore’s not the only place where you wouldn’t know your neighbours. Today, even in Mumbai, you would be only on a hello-bye basis with your neighbours. I guess that’s ’cause most people work and commute long hours and there’s barely any time for anything else.
Plus, all the doors gotta remain shut as security is such an issue.
Except, of course, if you live in a colony/building/area full of Gujaratis… They still live the good old way, bantering away with doors open 🙂
Thanks Sosha for dropping by!
I kind of agree that Mumbai these days, especially in the suburbs is just like how I described Singapore since both parents work and most children go to day care.
The Mumbai I mentioned is a bit older, atleast a decade and a half back and this is an older building where at that point in time, almost everyone came in when the building was built and everyone knew everybody else, not just in the building, but in the lane/road also.
Today, when I go back, I don’t know half my neighbours as they’ve come in after I’ve moved to Singapore and the month or so there is not enough to make that strong relations.
You’re from Mumbai? It feels good to hear from a fellow Mumbaikar, do keep dropping in…
Yes, I realised you’re referring to the older Mumbai. My parents talk about similar days fondly 🙂
I’m from Mumbai 🙂
I’ve lived in my apartment in Singapore for about a year and a few months, and I have met one neighbor. And that’s only because I asked her what her name was in the elevator and introduced myself.
Maybe it’s because I’m the only foreigner on the floor, but no one seems to care about meeting their neighbors.
PS found you through BlogHer! Hello!
Hi Flora, thanks for dropping by! I know exactly what you mean! The neighbours we’ve met so far are usually in in the elevator and it’s because we’re either going to work or coming back from work. Do you live in private housing or HDB? Private housing tends to be more cliqueish than HDB, but then you get all sorts of people everywhere. I just checked your blog, you live a very interesting life, I’ll be popping in more often…
I live in a condo on the East Coast. It does seem to be very cliqueish here, especially amongst parents with children.
@Sosha, yup, those were the days….but then guess everyone feels like that..
@Flora, parents with children tend to have a language and group of their own, ask me, I am one! Generally when parents, mostly moms I guess of children of a similar age meet, conversations tend to be of things that are child-related, which can put off others..