Tag Archives: Self-Care

International Self-Care Day: Care That Does Not Come with a Price Tag

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International Self-Care Day is observed on 24 July. The date is deliberate: 24/7, a reminder that care for oneself is not meant to be occasional or dramatic but woven into daily life. The International Self-Care Foundation uses that simple numerical symmetry to reinforce a straightforward point: self-care is ongoing, not seasonal. It is an appealing idea. It is also one that many people misunderstand.

Some hear “self-care” and think of spa vouchers, expensive skincare, gym memberships, and curated morning routines. Others hear it and switch off entirely because it sounds indulgent, vague, or commercial. In conversations around me, the most common misconception is this: self-care means spending money. If you are not buying, booking, or upgrading something, then you are not caring for yourself. That assumption deserves scrutiny.

Self-care, at its core, has nothing to do with consumerism. It is about maintenance. It is about preserving function. It is about the ordinary decisions that prevent collapse. The World Health Organisation defines self-care as the ability of individuals to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and cope with illness, with or without professional support. That definition is practical and unsentimental. It includes sleep. Food. Hygiene. Medication. Boundaries. Knowing when you need help. It does not require scented candles. So perhaps International Self-Care Day is less about treating yourself and more about asking a sharper question: Am I quietly making my own life harder than it needs to be?

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Self-care is not self-soothing
Before going further, it helps to draw a distinction that often gets blurred. Self-soothing is about immediate comfort. It calms distress in the moment. Watching a series after a long day. Ordering takeaway when you are exhausted. Scrolling aimlessly to avoid thinking about something difficult. These behaviours can be understandable responses to stress. They are not inherently wrong.

Self-care is about long-term stability. It might not feel as comforting in the moment. Going to bed on time instead of watching another episode. Cooking a simple meal instead of defaulting to convenience. Having a difficult conversation instead of letting resentment build. Booking a health check you have been postponing. Turning down an invitation because you are already stretched.

Self-soothing reduces discomfort now. Self-care reduces damage later. Both have a place. A life without comfort would be joyless. But when comfort consistently undermines stability, it stops being care. If every evening ends in exhaustion because you traded sleep for distraction, that is not self-care. If every week is overloaded because you cannot decline requests, that is not generosity; it is depletion.

A useful test is this: Will this decision make tomorrow easier or harder? That question removes the aesthetic layer and gets to the logic underneath.

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Why self-care matters more than we admit
It is tempting to frame self-care as something gentle and optional. In reality, it is strategic. Bodies and minds adapt to what you repeatedly expose them to. If you normalise chronic sleep deprivation, your baseline mood shifts. If you treat stress as inevitable and unchangeable, your tolerance narrows. If you postpone preventive care, small issues compound quietly.

In many global cities, including places like Singapore, where long working hours and commuting time are common, the rhythm of life can become relentless without anyone intending harm. Work extends into evenings through messages. Family obligations overlap with professional responsibilities. Weekends disappear into errands. No single demand seems unreasonable. The accumulation becomes the problem.

Self-care interrupts accumulation. It protects capacity. When you are rested, fed, and not constantly overstimulated, your reactions soften. You are less brittle. You make fewer impulsive decisions. You recover from setbacks faster. Relationships improve not because you become perfect, but because you are less depleted.

There is also a quieter benefit: perspective. Exhaustion narrows thinking. Everything feels urgent. Everything feels personal. When you are steadier, problems shrink to their actual size. Self-care does not remove difficulty. It prevents avoidable difficulty.

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The consumer myth
If the loudest version of self-care involves products and services, it is reasonable that people assume it is expensive. Wellness has become an industry. But maintenance does not require merchandise.

Consider what costs nothing:

  • Going to bed 30 minutes earlier.
  • Drinking water regularly.
  • Stepping outside for 10 minutes of daylight.
  • Declining one unnecessary commitment.
  • Stretching before sleep.
  • Turning off notifications for an hour.
  • Planning three simple meals for the week.

None of these actions are glamorous. None of them photograph well. All of them have a measurable impact. When self-care becomes transactional, it risks excluding people who do not have spare income or time. That distortion is worth correcting. Care is not a luxury tier. It is baseline.

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Habit problem or life problem?
Here is a necessary counterpoint. Not every struggle is a self-care failure. Sometimes what feels like a discipline issue is actually a structural issue. If your workload is objectively unreasonable, perfect routines will only help you endure it slightly better. If a relationship is chronically draining, better sleep will not fix the dynamic. If your environment is constantly overstimulating, mindfulness exercises alone may not compensate.

A clarifying question helps: If I practised solid self-care for two weeks, would the core strain still be there? If the answer is no, you likely need habit adjustments. If the answer is yes, you may need boundaries, delegation, renegotiation, or longer-term change.

This is not about dramatic life overhauls. It is about accuracy. Self-care should not become a way to tolerate what should be changed.

Prioritising self-care without making it complicated
When life is full, the instinct is to overhaul everything. That rarely works. A more reliable approach is a sequence. Start with three tiers:

  • Tier 1 Stability: Sleep, regular meals, basic movement, and essential appointments. These are not optional extras. Protect them first.
  • Tier 2 Friction reduction: One small system that makes weekdays easier. Preparing clothes the night before. Pre-deciding breakfast. Blocking focused work time. Simplifying social commitments.
  • Tier 3 Restoration: Activities that refill you, like reading, walking, prayer or reflection if that is part of your life, unhurried conversations, and hobbies.

Choose one action from each tier. Not five. Not ten. One. Maintain that for two weeks before adding anything else. This keeps self-care from becoming another ambitious project that collapses under its own weight.

Self-care across life seasons
The shape of self-care changes depending on where you are.

Students: For students, self-care often means structure rather than indulgence. Consistent sleep before exams. Breaking the study into focused blocks. Taking short walks to clear cognitive fatigue. Reducing comparisons on social media. It is less about spa days and more about cognitive sustainability.

Early-career professionals: Here, the temptation is to prove yourself through overextension. Self-care might look like learning to leave on time occasionally, protecting one evening a week from work, and recognising that burnout is not a badge of ambition.

Mid-career professionals: Responsibilities compound here. Work, ageing parents, children, and financial planning. Self-care may require renegotiating expectations. Delegating where possible. Accepting that you cannot attend every event. Letting go of perfection in some areas to preserve energy in others.

Caregivers: For caregivers, self-care is often the hardest to justify. Yet without it, capacity collapses. It might mean arranging short relief windows, even if imperfect. It might mean maintaining one social connection outside caregiving. It might mean asking for help before resentment builds.

Across all seasons, the principle is similar: reduce avoidable strain, preserve energy, and prevent compounding damage.

Practical ways to embed self-care into a busy life
Grand gestures are unreliable. Small placement works better.

  • Attach care to existing routines: Stretch while waiting for the kettle. Walk during phone calls. Reflect during a commute rather than scrolling. Insert care where it fits naturally.
  • Protect sleep with intention: Treat bedtime as an appointment. Not a reward after productivity, but a foundation for it.
  • Simplify decisions: Decision fatigue drains energy. Repeatable meals. Fixed grocery lists. Pre-planned workout days. Remove unnecessary variation.
  • Use language carefully: Instead of saying “I should exercise,” say “I need to move so I feel better tomorrow.” The shift sounds small, but it reframes care as functional, not moral.
  • Limit exposure: Not every notification deserves attention. Not every debate deserves your participation. Curating input is a form of self-care.
  • Normalise asking for support quietly: If stress persists, seeking guidance from a counsellor, GP, or trusted advisor is not a failure. It is maintenance at a different level. Softer phrasing does not reduce its importance.
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Underwriting self-care into your life
Perhaps the most honest way to think about self-care is this: it is less about optimisation and more about attention. It is the quiet habit of noticing when something feels strained and choosing not to ignore it. Not everything can be fixed immediately. Not every demand can be removed. But there is dignity in responding thoughtfully rather than reactively. A little more sleep. A little less noise. One fewer unnecessary obligation. Care rarely announces itself loudly. It accumulates, quietly shaping the texture of ordinary days. And over time, that texture matters more than any grand gesture ever could.

Self-care: Make an appointment with yourself

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I recently attended a webinar where one of the speakers, a renowned doctor with fingers in many pies said that one of the best things we can do for ourselves is to take some time out every day and do something for ourselves. This is essentially what self-care is all about. Self-care includes anything you do deliberately to keep yourself healthy, be it physical, mental and spiritual. Although prioritising self-care may sound like common sense, especially if you’re considering longevity, it’s often the first thing to go when we find ourselves in challenging situations, whether because of bad health, a financial crisis, job loss, divorce or, today during the pandemic. This is why deliberately is one of the most important words in the definition and why it is important to keep it top of mind and not an after-thought, especially when we find ourselves in challenging times. One needs to be conscious of their well-being before one can achieve true self-care.

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Today more than ever, we are hearing about self-care and according to Google Trends, the number of searches for “self-care” has more than doubled since 2015. Self-care is part of the answer to how we can all better cope with daily stressors, according to some experts because today people are feeling lonelier and less able to unwind and slow down, which makes them feel more anxious and overwhelmed by even the simplest tasks.

Self-care is an important part of living a healthy and happy lifestyle. Looking after ourselves both mentally and physically is crucial to taking control of our health. We lead increasingly busy lives and it can be easy to forget to put ourselves first, especially if we have multiple responsibilities and other people to care for. But looking after ourselves will make us feel better, and the better we feel, the better we will be in all areas of our lives – from work to relationships. Self-care doesn’t have to involve a huge time commitment and it doesn’t have to cost the earth. It could be as easy as taking a bath, relaxing with a good book, taking a walk outside or eating a favourite food. It’s about making a commitment to putting yourself first, even just for a while. Self-care is important to maintain a healthy relationship with one’s self as it produces positive feelings and boosts confidence and self-esteem. Also, self-care is necessary to remind the individual and others that their needs are important too.

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Self-care has several benefits, most of which are interlinked and committing to a regular self-care routine will improve one’s overall wellbeing. Research suggests self-care promotes positive health outcomes, such as fostering resilience, living longer, and becoming better equipped to manage stress.

Self-care can improve physical health: A big part of self-care is committing to looking after one’s body and becoming more attuned with its needs. Whether it’s brushing your teeth, exercising more or getting enough sleep each night, part of any programme of self-care should focus on looking after one’s physical health.

Self-care can reduce stress and anxiety: Making time for relaxing activities, even something as simple as such as taking a warm bath, listening to music or practising yoga or meditation, is another common theme of self-care. Any activity that makes one feel more relaxed can help to reduce symptoms of stress and anxiety and to lift their mood.

Self-care can boost self-esteem: As well as helping to calm the nerves, taking time to relax and look after oneself can have a positive impact on the way one sees themselves, treating oneself with kindness can make them look upon themselves more kindly. Studies have found that people with higher self-esteem find it easier to deal with setbacks and are more likely to achieve goals of self-improvement.

Self-care protects mental health: Making changes to prioritise self-care can help to manage mental health issues and might even prevent them from getting worse. Of course, self-care is not a substitute for professional help, and one shouldn’t feel they have to tackle their problems alone. If mental health is suffering, please talk to someone. However, if someone is looking to improve their mental wellbeing, taking the time to care for themselves, both mentally and physically is important.

Self-care can lead to better relationships: It makes sense if you think about it: the happier and healthier an individual is, the more they can give to a relationship. This is especially important if the person is a parent or carer when it can be so easy to put someone else’s needs first, but they must look after their health too.

Self-care leads to a healthy work-life balance: Contrary to common belief, workaholism is not a virtue. Overwork and the accompanying stress and exhaustion can make one less productive, disorganised and emotionally depleted, leading to all sorts of health problems, from anxiety and depression to insomnia and heart diseases. Professional self-care habits like taking intermittent breaks, setting professional boundaries and avoiding overextending ensures that one stays sharp, motivated and healthy.

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Self-care helps with stress management: While a little dose of stress is a healthy way to nudge us to meet the deadlines or finish that overdue task, constant stress and anxiety can hurt our mental and physical health. Smart self-care habits like eating healthy, connecting with a loved one or, practising meditation cuts down the toxic effects of stress by improving the mood and boosting the energy and confidence levels.

Self-care leads to better physical health: Self-care is not just about mental health, its also about caring for the physical self, by eating healthy, taking adequate sleep, caring about your hygiene and exercising regularly. Most of us are all less able to handle the stresses that come our way when we’re depleted by physical and emotional exhaustion. Or, put more positively, we are more resilient and more able to handle life’s stress when we are feeling our best both physically and emotionally. A massage, a hot bath, or another form of pampering revitalises us inside and out.

Self-care may boost physical health: While self-pampering doesn’t always lead to major improvements in overall health the way a healthy diet and exercise do, the relaxation one gets from it can trigger the relaxation response. This, in turn, can prevent chronic stress from damaging one’s health. So in a sense, self-care is good for you inside and out.

Self-care can improve emotional health: Taking time out to care for yourself can remind us and others that we and our needs are important, too. Having a well-cared-for body can make us feel good about ourselves and our life, and conveys to others that we value ourselves and this can contribute to long-term feelings of well-being.

Self-care makes one a better caregiver: People who neglect their own needs and forget to nurture themselves are at danger of deeper levels of unhappiness, low self-esteem, and feelings of resentment. And people who spend their time only taking care of others can be at risk of getting burned out, which makes it more difficult to care for others or themselves. Taking time to care for themselves regularly can make them better caretakers for others.

So start living and stop existing because life is a precious gift to waste when there is a choice to have a more meaningful existence. Life has many responsibilities and tends to throw curveballs when we least expect it, but it’s important to remember that taking care of ourselves is also our responsibility. Little things like reading a good book, sipping some great tea, enjoying a warm bath, playing some games, listening to the laugh of a child or playing with them are essential for our daily happiness. So, put away what is taking the time and take some time, even if it is just 30 minutes a day and spend some quality time with yourself.