Tag Archives: Career

Dilemma of a mother

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Yesterday at work I got a call from GG. She sounded quite upset and asked me this question, “Mama why don’t we both spend more time together doing things?” I was quite set out by this question and the rest of the work day deteriorated. I spoke to her after I reached home and told her that when we go on our holiday (soon, very soon), we’ll do some mom-and-daughter stuff together like shopping and leave the boys at home

This morning when I woke up and checked my Facebook news feed, I saw that an old school friend had quit her job to be a SAHM (Stay At Home Mom) since her daughter was giving the equivalent of what is the O Levels here in May 2012. She wanted to be with her and give her moral support.

Everyday, especially now that the holidays are on, both G & BB don’t want me to go to work. On Monday when I was at home nursing a cold, both of them were so happy to see me there with them the whole day that it literally broke my heart!

This is an issue I’ve been grappling with for the past year or so. On on hand I do want to be a SAHM and be there physically for my children, but on the other hand, without the intellectual stimulation that work gives me, I am worried that I will mentally atrophy. I think going to work gives me the much needed ‘me time’ I need without needing to be a mom 24/7 and getting called to settle any/all differences/fights (choose the word) at home. The income I earn is useful too, to ensure that we are able to give our children all the extras that we want.

On one hand, I do know that if my current position was as interesting as it was made out to be in the initial interviews, then maybe I would enjoy this a lot more. As it is, the project I was hired for has been moved to mid next year and so i do not have any ‘output’ to show. Also since I leave about 3 hours earlier, the impression I get is that I am not thought as part of the team and things are happening without my involvement. Aah well, the best thing for me to do is to either accept this or quit. I have about a month to think through this well and would have made my decision by the time I am back from my holiday!

In the meantime, here’s something that came on my Facebook newsfeed a couple of days back. It’s an ivillage article about being able to afford to stay at home and what you can do if that is what you want to do.

Traffic Travails and the need for a set of wheels

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This post was supposed to be posted on Tuesday, but for some reason, I didn’t do it then. The traffic that day was was the worst I have seen in my 2.5 months of commute. In about 30 mins, the bus that I was on moved the distance which would not have taken 5-7 minutes to cover on a normal day! The best part, there is no reason for this heavy traffic. If there was a major accident somewhere on the route, it would seem understandable but this is ridiculous. Maybe there was an accident, but I didn’t see anything that seemed to indicate any accident on the way. I think something should be done and soon. The BKE which in normal traffic conditions take around 10 minutes and during the morning peak hours take around 15-20 minutes to cover took about 40 minutes to cover on Tuesday! Yesterday S dropped me to work since he had some work in his Head Office which is not very far from my office. It took us around 35 minutes to reach my office! It is times like this I really want to have a car. But the costs really deter me. Add to the cost of the car and the COE (Certificate of Entitlement) which is ‘Uniquely Singapore’, I also will have to pay roughly around S$3 in ERP (Electronic Road Pricing) every day. This in addition to the S$100 for carpark charges per month. I don’t think I earn that much to justify this spending. Now I am dreading the office moving to the other end of Singapore and my commute will be from one end of Singapore to the other end (the longer end as I keep reminding my colleagues).

On the work front, another of my colleagues has decided to quit. He told us in confidence yesterday that he feels the organisation is going nowhere and so he wants out before it is too late. I am really concerned about the turnover of staff in this organisation. I am not sure what to do. Maybe I should work on my CV this weekend and see if I get some interview calls in the next month or so. If I get something by early December, then it would be ideal. Since I am in my probation period right now, I need to give them only two weeks notice. So if I get a new position soon, then I quit in the first week of December and give notice before I go on my holiday and then come back and join the new company. Will this work for me? God, if you are up there, listening and reading this, please do something, willya?

Dreams…..and then reality!!

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‘Subah ka sapna hamesha sach hota hai’! This muhavra or saying in Hindi means that what you dream in the early hours of the morning will come true or that it is your subconscious giving you an indication of days to come. The past few days I’ve been getting some real vivid dreams and this is an anomaly for me as sleep is usually dreamless. I’ve been actively seeking a new position for the last fee months as the atmosphere where I work in has become toxic. Nothing has come of this search yet but hopefully this will change in 2011. Now about 2-3 days back I had this dream just before I woke up where it was probably my first day in the new place.

I am sitting with someone from my old place, let’s call him ‘A’ and we are discussing something – some marketing strategy I assume – when I make a suggestion. At that A turns to me and says “brilliant”. I knew getting you here was perfect. Then I am called to a meeting and the meeting is led by an Indian woman and the rest of the people also seem to be Indian. Now this looks like a scene out of india as all of them are wearing indian clothes.

What do you make if this? I decided to put this down here so that I can test the efficacy of whether morning dreams do come true.

Pray for me willya?