A friend is someone who probably knows you better than anyone else and we all need a good friend. You don’t need many friends, but a few close ones will have your back come what may.
So here’s a poem to the good friends we all have in our lives.
You have been with me through thick and thin We’re so alike, we could be a twin
You hold me up when I cry and laugh with me when I am happy We could be crying one day and on an another crazy laughing with glee
You are only a phone call away, even if we now live far away Our lives are now separate, but our bond is still weighty
We can go months without being able to speak or meet And then pick it all up in a heartbeat Chatting as if those months didn’t happen Meeting up and chlling out and having a lot of fun!
A friend is family whom you choose They are there when you are feeling the blues When life gives you lemons, they are right there To make lemonade and grin at life together
Let’s raise a cheer to a good friend To the one who raises your spirits like no other A good friend is hard to find So when you find one, cherish and hold them close
As an old saying goes, friends are the family we choose. The role of a friend in someone’s life is great and to a large extent, many of our decisions are determined by what our friends say and do.
Friendship are as important to our wellbeing as eating right and exercising and they also help us grow through each year of our lives. The basic components of any relationship, from our marriage to our coworkers, are all founded in friendship. We learn how to interact with people because of our friends, even the ones that are opposite from us or share a different worldview.
One of the most overlooked benefits of friendship is that it helps keep our minds and bodies strong. In fact, it’s as important to our physical health as eating well and keeping fit. A recent Harvard study concluded that having solid friendships in our life even helps promote brain health. Friends helps us deal with stress, make better lifestyle choices that keep us strong, and allow us to rebound from health issues and disease more quickly. Friendship is equally important to our mental health. One study even suggested spending time with positive friends actually changes our outlook for the better.
Friends don’t completely cure loneliness, but they do help us during lonely times. They teach us how to accept kindness and also to reach out when we need help. Having a steady stream of friends lets us know that some friendships won’t last forever but each one brings something special. We learn more about ourselves and how important it is to have someone, who knows and understands you. A good friend can change our value system so we learn to inject more meaning into our lives. In spending time with friends, we fill up our lives with great conversation, heartfelt caring and support, and laugh out loud fun. When we fall on hard times, friends are there to put things in perspective and help us. When we have success, they’re smiling at our good fortune. We don’t just live when we have healthy friendships, we thrive.
The original idea for a day of friendship came from Hallmark cards in the 1930’s. Originally celebrated on 2nd August, the day was largely viewed cynically by the public as a money making exercise, sales of friendship day cards did not take off in Europe and by the mid-1940’s the day had faded into obscurity in the USA. The idea of a day to honour friendship was, however, adopted by a number of countries in Asia where it remained a popular custom to reserve a day for celebrating friendships and the exchange of gifts between friends.
The first World Friendship Day was proposed for 30 July 1958 by the World Friendship Crusade, an international civil organisation that campaigns to foster a culture of peace through friendship. Many years later, in 2011, the 30th July was declared as the International Day of Friendship by the General Assembly of United Nations.
Because friends are so important in our lives, in 1997, the UN General Assembly made a proposal to make 30 July the International Day of Friendship, which defined the culture of peace as a set of values, attitudes and behaviours that reject violence and endeavour to prevent conflicts by addressing their root causes with a view to solving problems. Recognising that enormous harm and suffering are caused to children through different forms of violence, the UN General Assembly emphasised that the promotion of a culture of peace and non-violence should be instilled in children through education. If children learn to live together in peace and harmony, as friends, that will contribute to the strengthening of international peace and cooperation.
The International Day of Friendship is also based on the recognition of the relevance and importance of friendship as a noble and valuable sentiment in the lives of human beings around the world. The day was proclaimed in 2011 by General Assembly with the idea that friendship between peoples, countries, cultures and individuals can inspire peace efforts and build bridges between communities.
The day places particular emphasis in involving young people, as future leaders, in community activities that include different cultures and promote international understanding and respect for diversity. It is also intended to support the goals and objectives of the Declaration and Programme of Action on a Culture of Peace and the International Decade for a Culture of Peace and Non-Violence for the Children of the World which was supposed to be between 2001 and 2010.
With the growing popularity of social media throughout the world, there has been an increase in celebrating World Friendship day and International Day of Friendship online as well as with community activities in local communities aimed at bringing those of different backgrounds together. How can you, as an individual mark this day? Reach out to a close friend either via telephone or using video to check on them and spend some qulity time together. Because of worldwide lockdowns, you may be unable to meet them physically, but today technology has ensured that distances are now not an issue anymore.
A human being needs people around him, some more than others. All of us have friends and this poem is a celebration of the friendships we have in our lives.
Like everyone, I too have friends, but most of my closest friends don’t live in the same country as me, but thanks to technology, these days we are as close as we used to be.
Everyone has friends, these are the people you choose to have in your lives – for better or worse. You meet people, strike conversations and suddenly there’s that zing which comes because you click so well with each other and a friendship is born! You can go days and even years where you don’t speak to each other, but can pick up almost instantly when you meet next.
Social media has a allowed a lot of people to reconnect with old friends. When I moved to Singapore, I completely disconnected with most of my friends. This was pre-social media days and so we used to exchange emails thats all. But with Facebook and now Whatsapp, friendships which were last seen a very very long time ago has been revived! I now regularly communicate with school friends, most whom I have not seen since the day we collected our school leaving exam results. Yesterday, I reconnected with my MBA friends, again whom I have not seen of or heard in ages!
We also make friends where we work in, but are these friendships true? Yes, sometimes, there are people with whom you have that connection and you go on to remain friends for the rest of your life and I have such friends too. But most of ‘work friendships’ are friendships which are ‘convenient friendships’. You are friends with someone at work because it is helpful to you. Do these friendships sustain themselves outside of work?
I have such friends too A friends I could talk about pretty anything in the sun and she would be my sounding board – it was like being with a therapist and counsellor together. Her answers would be unbiased and with an outsiders view and I suddenly got insights that I never had thought of. Or if I wanted to vent about work, she was there with her two cents worth, which would make me see the issue from another angle. But, and a big but, we didn’t socialise outside of work. After we both left the organisation (she first and then me after about a year), we have met for the grand total of…..Once!! We still text each other once a while – think birthdays and festivals and keep talking of meeting up, but that never happens.
Slowly I realised that office friendships don’t really work. People in most workplaces want to be friends with you for a reason – once that reason is over, they tend to ignore you and you keep wondering what went wrong, or they continue to talk to you, just to get information from you which will benefit them.
Now I may sound cynical, but this has been a long drawn-out lesson in the world! I am pretty naive like that – I like to see the goodness of people and prefer not to think that people have ulterior motives, but then that is the truth in today’s world.
It’s taken me this long to realise this – have a small number of true friends – friends you can share anything with – and not be judged rather than having a large number of acquaintances.
But if you have a true friend, cherish them and keep them close to your heart, as in the words of Mastercard – true friends are PRICELESS!
On Sunday evening, we went to my inlaws place for haldi Kumkum and it was a fun evening. BB & GG got to meet up with some old friends whom they hardly see these days since they’ve moved away and are in different schools. At one point there was so much noise, we couldn’t hear ourselves talk – there were about 9 kiddos in the house, including two little ones. It was funny seeing how they split themselves gender-wise – the boys playing with their cars in one room and roaring with laughter at bodily functions, something that only little boys are capable of finding humour in and the girls playing god knows what but which included loads of shouting, dancing and singining in one room. The two little ones shuttled between both rooms, somtimes scared as they saw the noise levels there.
Image source - Wikipedia
It was really fun catching up with friends like this and we have decided to do it once again soon (after the exams). While talking about the different activities our kiddos do I was stuck by something. Most of their friends who came visiting on Sunday were learning Indian things (classical music, classical dance etc) since they learn they non-Indian things in school, something which every self-respecting tambrahmkid does, but BB & GG are different. BB & GG have been
Image from Wikipedia
learning Indian classical Carnatic music for about a year now and GG as a counterpoint to this has been learning Ballet since the time she was around three years old. She enjoys ballet, but is not very good at it. It’s not something that she’ll be doing as a career, but it is something that gives her pleasure. I enjoy this dischotomy and it gives me pleasure that GG is blending the traditional with the modern, just like this world that is all hers!
Now I have to get BB to take something that complements what GG is doing – but BB is alll boy and so I am unsure if he will enjoy it. Well, there’s always hope. Next year, when they go to Primary 3, they need to take up some compulsary Co-Curricular Activities. Since BB is always at home – on the iPhone, on the computer or on the TV, both S and me want him to take up some physical activity like soccor, wushu or chookball!
Memories and Such 