Experiences over Things – Because Experience is the best Teacher

“Buy experiences, not things. Spending on experiences makes people happier than spending on things. Things get broken and go out of style. Experiences get better every time you talk about them.” – Jean Chatzky

When I was younger, I wanted the best of everything – be it clothes, skincare, holidays and material things. But as I grow older, material things are slowly losing the importance they once had. When the urge to fill cupboards reduced, the urge to experience started increasing.

I also find that this is something that younger people do more than us. It is perhaps something to do with a scarcity of resources. Growing up in a middle class regulated India, we were hard-pressed to have enough money for a lot of material things and a lot of things that today would seem normal, even in India used to be considered luxury items. But today’s children have grown up with a lot of things we considered a luxury. For example, BB & GG took their first overseas trip and plane ride when they were slightly over a year old while I must have taken my first domestic plane ride when I was about 10-11 years old and my first overseas trip only in my twenties!

For today’s generation who are digital natives, they only know a world where the largest retail store doesn’t own any items aka Amazon, the biggest transportation service doesn’t own any vehicles, Uber, and the most popular hotel chain doesn’t own any hotels aka AirBnB. In a world where jobs are not stable and freelancing and being a digital nomad is slowly becoming a thing, it is no wonder that they prefer to have fewer possessions and more experiences.

So what makes some people choose experiences over things? And while reading up about this issue, I realised that there are many people like me, whole encompass the spectrum of people of all ages, who are starting to opting out of accumulating things and exploring experiences instead.

Experiences result in greater happiness: According to research, experiences result in longer-lasting happiness than material possessions. Humans quickly adapt to their external surroundings and as a result, the happiness provided by new material possessions is short-lived. Over time, people’s satisfaction with the things they buy decreases, whereas their satisfaction with experiences over time increases.

Experiences provide better memories: We usually look back on memories and these memories, especially if they are associated with our loved ones provide us with years of pleasant memories and bring a warm smile in our hearts when we think about them. Does something you own bring that smile to your face? Maybe, but memory will always trump a physical thing.

Experiences result in less clutter: Most physical possessions eventually become a burden on our lives. They take up physical space in our homes and mental space in our minds. They require care, attention, maintenance, organization. Experiences, on the other hand, are accompanied with little to no physical baggage. All you need to do to go back to a memory is to close your eyes and think about that time, there’s no need to clutter up your homes, which are getting smaller, especially in crowded cities like Singapore.

Experiences provide greater opportunity to connect with other people: When we experience things with others because we enjoy time together with people we love and are comfortable with, we can connect with them on a level that spending that time and money on things just can’t do.

Experiences result in greater mindfulness: In a 2010 research, it was concluded that a wandering mind is an unhappy mind. And the greater a person’s ability to stay present in a given moment, the greater happiness they experience during and after. Experiences provide a greater opportunity and this regard.

Experiences result in less comparison with others: In a materialistic society, we are always comparing ourselves with others and if we have a bigger house or more possessions, we are supposed to more successful compared to whom we are comparing ourselves with. But how do you compare experiences? There’s no standard template with which you can do that. An experience that is very important to one will have no value to another and so everyone’s experience is unique and special.

Experiences let you grow as an individual: When you experience and learn different things, you can view the world differently. Experiences make you more emphatic and make an individual a better person overall.

So let’s start gathering more experiences to experience the various facets of life to live a more enriched and fulfilling life. While material things may bring fleeting moments of joy, but are separate from the individual. Experiences, on the other hand, live with an individual for a long time, maybe even their own life and become intrinsically entwined with the individual. And at the end of the day, we are the total sum of all our experiences.

2021 Week 09 Update

This week was a pretty quiet week because the children are on their semesteral holiday and with the end of this semester, they finish their first year of their polytechnic education. Though BB went to school more, GG spent almost all of the her first year having online lessons. As I have been saying previously, hopefully, she will go back to school on a more fulltime basis in year 2.

The good news this week was that my parents finally got the first dose of the covid vaccine. In Mumbai, both private and government hospitals were allowed to administer the vaccine and I spent a good bit of time trying to find a hospital near our home for them, but they managed to walk into a nearby government hospital and because of my father’s Parkinson’s disease, they were also jumped ahead in the queue. Now after their second dose, they will be in a much better place and my sister and I heaved a huge sigh of relief when they got the vaccine.

Tomorrow is the International Women’s day and while there is a post waiting for you tomorrow about the day, I just want to point out that during this last year, women have had to shoulder a larger part of the disturbances which we all have been sujected to. And this is not just anecdotal. I have been speaking with family and friends and especially those who have young children who are home schooling, have had it hard when they also have a fulltime job to do. BB & GG are older now, but I have been told that those with younger children, that is those not yet in school, also have to contend children becoming very sticky and clingy which again will impact them during their work day and when they will go back to work.

And so we come to today’s positive quote is about happiness. If we think about it, it is a state of mind and we expend the same energy to be happy as to be miserable, so why not just be happy instead of being negative and miserable?

On that note, stay safe people and wishing all my women readers a happy women’s day!

2021 Week 08 Update

And just like that, with the click of a finger, today is the last day of February.

I am still going strong with my resolutions and I am positively cautious that this will be sustained on an on-going basis for the rest of my life. My average steps per day were slightly less this month as compared to January, but I still managed to hit my target number each day. I have walked up to the norder between the states of Selangor and Perak. This means, from my house in the western part of Singapore, I have crossed the three states of Johor, Malacca and Negri Sembilan plus the Federal Territory of Kuala Lumpur and almost traversed the state of Selangor with the state of Perak just a few kilometers away.

I am reading enough, but not enough for my standards yet. I do try to read for 15-20 minutes daily, but sometimes social media and other distractions get in the way. In the past two months, I have read 14 books and am ahead on my yearly target for books to read.

And on that note, today’s positivity quote is something I am going to abide by. Nobody is ever too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.

We are still seeing COVID-19 cases across the world, but there seems to be trend of the number of cases dropping in many countries. Singapore routinely sees single to low double digit cases almost everyday with most of them being cases coming into the country or imported cases as it’s called. Local cases are zero to low single digits on a daily basis but we will not be moving out of our current phase of mask wearing and having people in homes anytime soon. I assume and pray that sometime in end 2021 or maybe early 2022, there may be enough herd immunity or enough people vaccinated across most of the world to allow some sort of pre-COVID travel.

We also had some family over yesterday for a dinner after so long, that it was refreshing to sit down and have a good chat. We did abide by our social distancing rules and there were not more than eight people in the house.

Have a wonderful week and stay safe, stay masked and be careful, especially with the vulnerable in your family, community and the wider areas.

2021 Week 07 Update

Today’s positivity quote is something we all need these days. Optimism has become a rare quality and we need to find something to be optimistic about. Because according to the author of this quote, Mary Lou Retton, optimism is a happiness magnet. If we think positive thoughts, then good things will happen to us.

This week was super hectic for me and I barely had time to catch my breath before the week ended. The children are a week before their exams and things are pretty quiet on that front too. They have gone through two semesters or one year of their first year and most of this year was online. BB has been going quite often to school this semester, but GG only had one face to face class per week. Hopefully, she will go back to school more often in year two.

Though the world has recorded more than 109 million active cases till date and more than 86 million of them having recovered from the disease which is about 99.6% of all infected. I also read that the daily reported cases of infections have been falling across the world for a month now and and on Tuesday, 16 February, hit their lowest since mid-October. This is good news for all of us, especially with vaccines being rolled out progressively across the world.

That’s all from me this week. Stay safe people!

2021 Week 06 Update

This is the Chinese New Year weekend and to those celebrating the lunar new year, Gong Xi Fa Cai, Xin Nian Kuai Le!

Because of the long weekend, it’s been a very quiet week, both at home and at work. Actually things have changed a lot in the last decade or so in Singapore, especially during Chinese New Year or CNY. I remember when GG & BB were younger, the country used to pretty much be shut down during this period, especially the first two days. I remember only the ethnic enclaves of Little India and Kampong Glam used to be open at full strength and we used to stock up on groceries and other essentials so that we don’t need to make a trip down to the stores. On the third day, some supermarkets used to open with limited opening hours and limited, non-Chinese staff. But today, even on the first day, most supermarkets and stores are open, even if it is on a limited basis.

Here’s this week’s positive thought. It’s from Paulo Cohelo and is something we should all do. Positivity breeds positivity and so let’s be enthusiastic about what we do so we all can have a positive energy surrounding us at all times.

As of yesterday, world over, there were about 110 million cases in total with about twenty-five million active cases, of which slightly over 99 thousand or 0.4% of active cases are critical and of the more than 83 million closed cases, 97% or more than 80 million cases have recovered and two million cases or 3% of all cases died.

Many countries have ramped up vaccinations and are steadily vaccinating their population starting with essential and healthcare workers and then the elderly and the vulnerable. The most popular vaccine seems to be the Pfizer/ BioNTech with 57 countries currently administering the vaccine followed by Oxford/AstraZeneca in 34 countries and Moderna in 27 countries.

Most of the world looks to be fully vaccinated by late 2022 and hopefully everyone in the planet who needs a vaccine will be protected by early 2023 when life will finally go back to a semblance of normalcy. Till then, we owe it to ourselves, our families and loved ones and the elderly and vulnerable in our homes and communities to protect ourselves by masking up, practicing hygiene and safe distancing.

Stay safe people!