Happiness is the only thing that multiplies when you share it. This is a quote that forces you to think on multiple levels. How is happiness defined and is the level of my happiness the same as someone else? It’s something that we seriously need to think about and once we unlock this lesson, it becomes that much easier to become happy and to spread happiness all around.
After about two weeks, my ankle and leg pain is much better. From a pain of 8 on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being very painful, it’s probably a three now. One of the days that GG was massaging my ankle, she pressed hard enough that we heard a pop from a bone that was painful to touch. But that pop helped in the healing so much that after that day.
We are about a year into lockdowns in most countries and with newer waves coming in, I am not sure when life will go back to being normal. Singapore will start easing some restrictions from next week, especially those about more people being allowed into offices. Residents between the ages of 45 and 59 are also encouraged to sign up for the vaccine and as soon as this was announced, S and I signed up for the vaccines, as did many others I know in this age group. We will get a notification once vaccines are ready and then we will have to book an appointment slot. I am quite eager to get vaccinated because of my parents. If there is an emergency, then between my sister and I, I am the one who will be able to get there faster and for this, I will need to be vaccinated so I am not forced to quarantine myself both sides.
BB got his results early last week and though he did better than the previous semester, he didn’t do as well as we expected. After a long talk, he has promised to pull up his socks and work hard in the next semester. This is probably his last chance to pull up his grades if he wants a chance to go to university after his national service.
This was all from my side this week, stay masked, stay safe and stay indoors if possible!
I grew up in Mumbai, very close to what is the heart of the tambram community in the city, Matunga. Where we lived was a 15 minute walk to the heart of the community, to the market and the temples, to the flower shops and the vegetable vendors, some of whom though they came from the northern states of Bihar and Uttar Pradesh, but could banter with the mamas and manis in Tamil. Before COVID-19 stuck and life changed, my mother used to make the thrice weekly trip every week to Matunga to get her fix of all of the above.
The other day while I was thinking about this, I realised that I actually grew up in an urban agraharam. So what is an agraharam you may ask? An Agraharam or Agrahara was a grant of land and royal income from it, typically by a king or a noble family in India, for religious purposes, particularly to Brahmins to maintain temples in that land or a pilgrimage site and to sustain their families. Agraharams were also known as Chaturvedimangalams in ancient times as well as known as ghatoka, and boyas. Agraharams were built and maintained by dynasties such as the Cholas and Pallavas. The name originates from the fact that the agraharams have lines of houses on either side of the road and the temple to the village god at the centre, thus resembling a garland around the temple. According to the traditional Hindu practice of architecture and town-planning, an agraharam is held to be two rows of houses running north–south on either side of a road at one end of which would be a temple to Shiva and at the other end, a temple to Vishnu. An example is Vadiveeswaram in Tamil Nadu.
Where we grew up was a collection of about 50-60 two to three storey buildings set in a sort of square with roads intersecting them. We were framed by educational institutes on three sides and a main road on the fourth. While our small community comprised of people from different communities across the various states of India, if I look back, I can see the Tamil Brahmin community most predominant here, with most of them from Kerala or the Palakkad Iyers. Most buildings, with some exceptions which only had people from a certain community as residents, had a few tambram families in residence. Everyone was a mama or mami and not uncle or aunty and everyone knew everyone, or at the very least knew our parents and grandparents, many of whom they were either together at school, in the same class or from the same village in Tamil Nadu or Kerala.
In my own building, the bulk of our neighbours were from my own community and this is why I call my small slice of area an urban agraharam. Everyone was solidly middle class and if you probed enough, you found some connection with them, either through family or friends and once the connection was made, you were part of them. I know now that even living in a secular and multi-community city like Mumbai made us quite insular when it came to Tamil culture. The only Tamil culture I knew was the Tambram one and coming to Singapore, to a culture similar to my own was actually a culture shock to me.
But, growing up in a community made mostly of people who had the same values, the same traditions as us was just as charming. Festivals which are unique to my community was commonplace here and I never questioned why the rest didn’t celebrate it. For example, the annual Avani avittam festival which is the only festival for the men who on this day would change their sacred threads used to be held in a nearby school with a few priests from one of the temples in Matunga coming over to conduct the rituals. Since there were enough men who wore the sacred thread, it probably made sense for the organizers to hold a mini session in our area. Since the day was not a public holiday, they used to do the session fairly early so the men and boys could then go on to work and school. And in all the years my grandfather and then father went here instead of to our temple in Matunga, I never questioned why. It all seemed normal to me. We loved going to each other’s homes for festivals like Diwali, Navratri and Ganesh Chaturti in our pavadais and sing songs and gorge on the delicacies.
That was a lovely time growing up. Everyone looked out for each other and mamas and mamis didn’t heaitate to scold or tell on a child they knew if the said child did something wrong. We thought nothing of going into anyone’s house for a drink of water or to use the bathroom. We were also quite safe in our little enclave and most of us pretty much lived our whole lives there till we moved out.
Life in our small community has changed now. Many buildings are being knocked down to make way for high rises, especially since this area is now a prime area, within what is considered the original Bombay and close, but not too close to the city. A lot of people from the community moved to suburbs like Chembur, Thane and Dombivili when the real estate prices here started picking up in the nineties. I think my grandparents and parents even explored the idea of moving to Chembur, but thankfully dropped the idea very soon. Life goes on, but in our area, the percentage of tambrams has reduced tremendously, so much so it can’t be called an agraharam anymore. I mourn for this loss, but c’est la vie and life must go on. The chakra of life never stops and I am sure in some of the suburbs I mentioned newer urban agraharams have been created.
This week and the following week is results week for BB & GG. GG’s results came first and while it was more or less expected, she didn’t do as much as she expected to do which meant her cumulative GPA fell down a bit, for which she was upset for about half a day and then bounced back promising to bring it up in the next semester. BB’s results come out tomorrow and I for one, am in equal parts anxious and worried.
My leg and ankle pain is still there and some days are quite bad. I am lucky that GG is a talented maseusse, though she does not know any technique, but helps me once or twice a day to massage the aching parts. This means my walking this month is getting hit and I don’t think I would walk as much as I have done in previous months. This is a busy week for me, but I think if the pain persists, I will have no choice, but go to the doctor next week and have it checked out. I know I am probably being negligent, but I hope this goes away before I need to see a specialist.
Today’s quote is a classic positivity quote which asks one to bring positivity with them wherever they go. It’s a great lesson, especially for me, since I am trying quite hard to be more positive in 2021. It means bringing something positive with you at all times, and making the best of any situation.
This week marks the official one year mark when the WHO declared the Covid-19 as a pandemic. On 11 March 2020, deeply concerned both by the alarming levels of spread and severity, and by the alarming levels of inaction, WHO made the assessment that COVID-19 could be characterised as a pandemic. Singapore had been one of the countries affected with cases as early as in January 2020.
As of yesterday, we have 119 million cases and over 2.5 million deaths caused by the virus. Of these numbers, the United States accounts for almost 30 million cases and half a million deaths. A country which only accounts for 4% of the world’s population accounts for 20% of the world covid related deaths. Brazil has overtaken India as the country with the second highest cases and India is at number four in the total number of deaths related to the pandemic. Singapore with about 60 thousand cases stands at number 99 and with 30 deaths in total is at number 171.
This week I have spent in pain in my leg. The pain which came on and off for a few weeks in my ankles was so bad this week that I could only hobble. I also had a weird stiffness in the middle of one of my calves, like what happens when you calves cramp. I have been spamming lots of muscle relaxants and medicated oils and also using crepe bandages to get some relief.
Today’s quote is a lesson that people, especially me needs to learn. While every day may not be good according to your definition of good, but if you look hard, you will find something something good even in the worst of days. So look for the little things that bring that little joy to your day, it can be as simple as reading a beautiful sentence, a lovely sunrise or sunset or even something that a loved one said to you. Life will be so much more beautiful!
With this note, stay safe people and if you or your loved ones are getting vaccinated, please go ahead and book your appointment and get vaccinated, for the sake of yourself and your loved ones. It’s only when we do our part will life start going back to a semblance of normal.
This week was a pretty quiet week because the children are on their semesteral holiday and with the end of this semester, they finish their first year of their polytechnic education. Though BB went to school more, GG spent almost all of the her first year having online lessons. As I have been saying previously, hopefully, she will go back to school on a more fulltime basis in year 2.
The good news this week was that my parents finally got the first dose of the covid vaccine. In Mumbai, both private and government hospitals were allowed to administer the vaccine and I spent a good bit of time trying to find a hospital near our home for them, but they managed to walk into a nearby government hospital and because of my father’s Parkinson’s disease, they were also jumped ahead in the queue. Now after their second dose, they will be in a much better place and my sister and I heaved a huge sigh of relief when they got the vaccine.
Tomorrow is the International Women’s day and while there is a post waiting for you tomorrow about the day, I just want to point out that during this last year, women have had to shoulder a larger part of the disturbances which we all have been sujected to. And this is not just anecdotal. I have been speaking with family and friends and especially those who have young children who are home schooling, have had it hard when they also have a fulltime job to do. BB & GG are older now, but I have been told that those with younger children, that is those not yet in school, also have to contend children becoming very sticky and clingy which again will impact them during their work day and when they will go back to work.
And so we come to today’s positive quote is about happiness. If we think about it, it is a state of mind and we expend the same energy to be happy as to be miserable, so why not just be happy instead of being negative and miserable?
On that note, stay safe people and wishing all my women readers a happy women’s day!
Memories and Such 