Category Archives: Writing

An Ode to Words…

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With my love for reading and writing, it’s actually surprising that I have never attempted poetry. Over the years, I’ve read poetry, but never really learnt to love it. So today, when I sat down to write this post, I found myself writing my first piece of poetry. It’s an ode to words. If anyone actually reads this piece, I’d love to have feedback…

An Ode to Words

Words that beleaguer; words that make you wonder,

Words to ponder; words that make your mind wander,

Words that teach; words that bring thoughts to speech.

But words can bring pain; words can bring shame,

Learn to use words with care, don’t get into a despair,

I love words, as you can see, words make me alive,

Words give definition to my life!

 

Time Turners aka If you could turn time back….

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Please do not read this post if you are a major Harry Potter fan and have not yet read the Cursed Child book. This post is heavily influenced by the book and contains spoilers in the book.

img_0671A couple of weeks back, I finished Harry Potter and the Cursed Child and the major premise of the book is time travel and what happens when you try to change reality if you go back in time.

In the book, the protagonists of this story, Albus Servus Potter, and Scorpius Malfoy, who are best friends, try to turn time back from an important event in one of the books – the death of Cedric Diggory. They try to do this three times and each time when they turn time back, they arrive back in the present time in an alternative universe, one that has no bearing on their actual present.

 

 

So I started thinking ‘What if I managed to get hold of a Time Turner’, what would I do? Initially, I was very excited and started thinking of all the times in my life that, in retrospect, I wished I had done or acted differently. I also wondered how my life would turn out had I changed even one aspect of my life.

 

Then I read about the Butterfly Effect. The Butterfly Effect is the sensitive dependence on initial conditions in which a small change in one state of a deterministic nonlinear system can result in large differences in a later state.

 

What it means is that small changes in one dimension (or a change in time) multiply and can have a dramatically different effect in the current state in time. This effect is part of the chaos theory.

When I read about this, I started thinking about this – if I did change any part of my life before today, then perhaps, today will not exist. I may be living a completely different world than what I am living today. I probably would not have S, GG or BB in my life!

At every point in our life, we make certain decisions based on our current knowledge. Our today is the sum total of all that knowledge and the cumulative effect of all those decisions. Who we are today, is, therefore the sum of all that we have done – right or wrong – till the now.

This is a similar lesson that Albus and Scorpius learnt. When they tried to stop Cedric from being killed, the reality they came to was completely different from the reality they left.

 

Let us embrace our current reality and learn to love life as it happens. Everything happens for a reason and this is so true here. When we try to change fate (or reality as it is), reality then throws a curve ball at us….

 

Financial Literacy for Teens and Young Adults

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BB & GG only started getting serious pocket money from the start of this school year. Luckily for us, they don’t really spend the money they get as pocket money, instead putting it in a money box. I’ve told them that at the end of the year, we will tally the money they’ve saved and half of that will go into their bank accounts and the other half is for them to spend.

I’ve also opened a trust savings account for them, this was when they were about a month old. Into this account went all the money they’ve received till date – all birthday money and any money that their doting grandparents and other relatives would give to them on festivals and occasions. I’ve also been putting a small sum into this account every month and over the years this has added up to a good amount. The money in this account is meant for tertiary and other education for both of them and I don’t want them to have access to this account ever!

So that BB & GG learn the importance of a savings account and learn to use it responsibly, I am keen that at least by the end of this year, I open savings accounts for them, these will not be linked to the ones I have already opened for them.

So that they know how to manage their finances, I’ve also been reading up on financial literacy. I actually consider this one of the most important subjects that should be, but is not taught in schools and colleges and so I decided to read up and then go on to teach them the same.

So what exactly is financial literacy? One definition I found and which I felt was very appropriate says, “Financial literacy is the ability to use knowledge and skills to make effective and informed money management decisions”.

Income and Expenses and the relationship between them
To be able to make informed money management decisions, the first thing you need to do is to teach your child what income and expenditure are and the relationship between them. In very simple terms, income is what you earn – your monthly or weekly salary plus anything else you earn when you are not working. Expenditure is everything you spend on. The difference between this is your net profit or loss. Profit happens when income is more than expenses and loss is when the reverse happens.

All expenses need not be bad, some expenses, which you incur to obtain something which will stay with you for a while (that is what we call an asset) is probably good expenses. Examples for this can be buying a house, spending money on learning something new which helps you in your day job or paying for your passion, which in turn is turned into a source of income.

However, not everything you buy that stays with you for a long time is a good expense. Now we bring into the picture a term called Depreciation. Simply put, depreciation is the reduction in value of an asset over a period of time due to wear and tear. A good example would be a car. You pay good money for the car, add to this the various taxes and the maintenance you pay for it over a period of time. When the time comes to sell the car, you would not get even half of what you’ve paid for it, this is depreciation. Another good example is electronic items when you buy them, you pay a premium, especially for some products. Then when the next upgrade comes, your current model is sold for pennies!

Spend, Save, and Share
When you earn, it does not mean that you need to save everything except that which you need for daily expenses and necessities. You should also keep some money to spend on things that you like. However, it is always better to divide your income into two or more buckets – to save, to spend and maybe to use for the less fortunate.

By this same token, if you have multiple goals, you can have multiple accounts in your bank

Saving for long and short term goals
The long term goals will be big goals – like a house, a car etc, medium and short term goals can be holidays, electronic equipment, etc and the daily expense account should be your usual account. As soon as your salary gets credited to your account, transfer the agreed upon percentage to each of these accounts. This is called ‘Paying Yourself First’.

Make sure that your ATM card is not linked to these accounts so there is no temptation to dip into them. Make it easy to see the balance online, but difficult to access it online and through the ATM. This will reduce the temptation to use these accounts as back-ups when you find yourself short.

Since BB & GG are not earning members of society nor have any long-term goals at the moment, all their savings will be for short or medium term goals. I am going to get them to write down their short and medium goals so that they have goals to work towards.

Budgeting
This is perhaps the biggest lesson that financial literacy teaches us and one that is often relegated to the bottom when it comes to personal finance. Anyone who deals with money needs to budget it. And when you are young like BB & GG, it becomes important that they learn this when they just start learning about money so that by the time they start earning decent money, budgeting becomes as essential to them as breathing or eating!

Budgeting is a plan you make each month (or week or whenever you get your income) on how to spend your money. Budgeting is important because it allows you to have a plan for your money and also makes sure that you always have money for things that are necessary and those that are important. It also keeps you on-track for your short, medium and long-term goals in life.

When you go to purchase anything, ask yourself always if you can live without the item. If yes, then go away and do not buy. If the answer is no, then still put it back, but think about it for a week or so. If after a week, you still can’t stop thinking about it, either see if you can afford it or if no, then plan to save it for your short-term goals.
Making an initial budget is quite simple – make a list of all income on one side, and then first move money to your savings, then account for the necessities and what’s left will be your fun money or money you can use for entertainment or for yourself without feeling guilty about it.

If you have basic accounting knowledge and know how to reconcile your own accounts, it will help you in own budgeting and financial planning.

The power of Compound interest
One of the biggest advantages when it comes to financial management, especially for those who start saving early on, compounding your money allows it to grow faster. Compound interest happens when the interest that is accrued to your savings account adds to the money into the account and that interest, in turn, earns more interest.

So for compound interest to be really effective, you need to start saving much earlier, rather than later. Even if you put in small sums, but at regular intervals over a period of time, starting from when you first start working (or even earlier, if possible), then with careful planning, you may even become a millionaire by the time you hit 50 years of age!

Here are some images which show you the immense power that is compounding.

 

As BB & GG grow older and more financially savvy, I want to introduce investing concepts to them. These are all topics for posts which will probably come later as they become more financially lierate.
Inflation

 

 

Random Thoughts – Gender Equality

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2000px-igualtat_de_sexes-svgThis week, I’ve had many thoughts swirling in my head, which I thought needed a post all by itself, rather than put it down in my weekly update, where it may not be really relevant.

One of the big news in the papers last week was about the risqué and sometimes obscene games played at the freshmen orientation at the National University of Singapore (NUS). Apparently, this is common in other Singapore universities too – Nanyang Technological University (NTU) and Singapore Management University (SMU). Reports said that the games were very sexualised in nature with some even invoking feelings of incest.

16d42f1Orientation camps are a chance for the incoming freshmen to meet other new students and make friends. As parents of young teens who will soon get into one of these universities (hopefully), this is cause for concern to me. Since all Singaporean and Singapore Permanent Resident males have to complete their national service before they enter university, this means that there is a two-year gap in age between the men and women who enter the freshman year. This becomes as much as six years or more when you compare a female freshman versus a male final year student.

Some students (both male and female) who were at the orientation didn’t feel that the games were wrong, which lead me to think how they thought of female emancipation. Games like this, which are often under the leadership of the student council and perhaps the university management tacitly condone sexism and misogyny at a very impressionable age. It becomes worse because, in these games, it’s often the men who play the aggressor and the women, the victims. I am a feminist and I strongly believe that when young men look at women in such a sexual way, in what is essentially a very non-sexual environment, then it leads them to be conditioned to think of women in such ways in other such non-sexual environments such as at work. This leads to a life-long tendency to believe that women are very inferior to them and always act in ways which do not demonstrate true gender equality. I guess when men who do not want to take part in such games, protest, they are then ridiculed and called names for being wimps!

The university has stopped all these games for this year at least and hopefully this will lead to a serious review on what can and cannot be acceptable.

stock-vector-colourful-hands-with-male-and-female-symbol-love-marriage-gender-equality-human-rights-and-120122377This actually leads to the other thing I have been thinking about for a week now. I usually steer clear of politics and since I am not a political commentator, I like to leave that to the experts. But I am sure everyone, including me, is watching the US Presidential elections run-up. I was very happy when the democrats finally (really finally!) elected a woman to become their nominee, in what was a historical moment in the history of the country. I along with millions of women worldwide cheered at this, but I was also a bit perturbed that it took them almost 240 years after independence to have a woman at spitting distance of the highest office in the country. For a country which calls itself the ‘greatest country in the world’, this is a bit disturbing as it does not really show that this greatness also lies in the equality of its daughters and sons.

However, the most disturbing part of the election campaign has been the republican nominee. I cringe each time I read about his comments on women, minorities, the disabled, (basically everyone except the traditional white male). At times I think nobody can be like this – misogynistic, rash and irresponsible, and wonder if this is the persona he has adopted to win the elections, then I read another article about him, going back to before he was the nominee and decide I was wrong, maybe he is like that in real life too. Then I really shudder and think of the country and its future.

As a woman, as someone who passionately believes in the equality of the sexes and as someone who believes in equal rights for everyone, I really hope this person does not win. If he does, women’s lib and emancipation will probably retrograde back to 1776 when America became free of the British and the words “Freedom”, “Liberty” and “Equality” are just words in the constitution

The Paradox of our Time

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I came across this beautiful speech/poem by His Holiness the XIV Dalai Lama and it resonated with me.

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Here’s another, similar speech by Dr. Bob Moorehead, which is worth a read!

“The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life. We’ve added years to life not life to years. We’ve been all the way to the moon and back but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We’ve done larger things, but not better things.

We’ve cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We’ve conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more but learn less. We plan more but accomplish less. We’ve learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships.

These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you and a time when you can choose either to share this insight or to just hit delete…

Remember, to spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn’t cost a cent.

Remember, to say, “I love you” to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person might not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.”

Today, most people live in bigger homes (per person per square feet), but who is there at home? Most families are nuclear in nature and even with just three or four people at home, the house is just that – rarely a home as with people’s schedules, there are just a handful of times when everyone is at home together. We don’t make time for the extended family, even during festivities and occasions.

With more disposable incomes, especially in countries like Singapore, the tendency to buy for the sake of buying something is very common. Hashtags like #buybuy are very common on social media platforms and the flaunting of new possessions seems to be a case of ‘keeping up with the Joneses and doing it one step more’! This in contrast, to some people who seem to adopt a minimalist attitude. I would like to go this route and so for the time being, I am stopping all non-essential purchases, preferring to buy from my closet and stash. I will only buy when I am completely out of the product.

We’re more connected than ever in the history of the world, but ironically we’re more alone than ever. As of June 2016, there are more than 1 billion Whatsapp groups in the world and more than 64 billion messages were sent using Whatsapp in one day at its peak! The normal Whatsapp traffic is approximately 42 billion messages per day, though I am not sure if this includes the voice and video messages. But how many of us actually take the time to speak to a loved one on a regular basis? It’s so much easier being in touch through a keyboard, though how much time does it take to take the same phone and dial a number. Even if you do not or cannot use international dialing, all you need to do is install one of the free apps like Skype or Viber and speak to your loved ones!

 

I am going to make a call to speak to my loved ones just as soon as I finish this post, will you?