Category Archives: Musing

Poem: Music to my Ears

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At work, almost as soon as I log into my laptop, I have my headphones on and start listening to music. The music I listen to is mostly Bollywood, with some fusion and shlokas thrown in. I have been adding to this collection for more than 10 years now and it just keeps growing! So this poem is because of this.

 

benefits-of-listening-to-music-at-work

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Music to my Ears

 

I plug in my headphones and start to move to the beat
Making sure I am still sitting in my seat

The rhythm starts slowly, building to a crescendo
My body starts to move, starts to glow

Suddenly realising that I am not at home but at work,
I temper my movements and start working to the tempo that is playing

The music fills my head, fills my soul
My work reflects the music I play, making me feel in control

My music fills my days, makes my day fly
Because of my music, my days make me not want to complain

 

 

In My Hands Today…

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Fireflies in the Mist – Qurratulain Hyder

8297030Fireflies follows the creation of modern day Bangladesh – from Indian province, to Partition, to the emergence of statehood – as told through the impassioned voice of Deepali Sarkar and others around her who live through the turbulence. Hyder perceptively and majestically follows the trajectory of Sarkar’s life — from her secluded upbringing in Dhaka to becoming a socialist rebel and to her ultimate transformation as a diasporic Bengali cosmopolitan — in the way that many of yesterday’s revolutionaries are slowly but surely ensnared within a net of class and luxury dangled in front of them.

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It’s been slightly more than three weeks since I started working and I got reacquainted with the beauty that is Office Politics!

 

For those who don’t know, Office politics “are the strategies that people play to gain an dvantage, personally or for a cause they support”. The term often has a negative connotation, in that it refers to strategies people use to seek advantage at the expense of others or the greater good.

Love it, revel in it, hate it or just play along with it, office politics are a staple in every organisation, be it a small organisation or a large multinational company. Someone who wants to be successful in his/her career needs to know how to play the game and eventually become a master at it!

 

I’ve seen different forms of the games people play at work and sometimes am amazed by the audacity of some of the tactics some people employ to get ahead. I always wonder if these people are wasted in the role they are in, they may have been better off as politicians instead of being a corporate slave.

 

 

To win at this game and come out smelling of roses, here are some strategies you should use, preferably as soon as you join a new organisation:

 

Map your organisation

In most organisations, the real power is not where the formal power lies. For example, maybe someone who has been there for a long time and knows the organisation inside-out, but who is fairly junior in position, may weld more soft power than the head of the organisation. This person may be able to influence people across the organisation and so has more power as he/she can people towards or away from someone.

So when you join a new organisation, watch for a couple of weeks and find out who the real influencers are and make them like you too.

 

Build social relations across the hierarchy

Make sure that the social relations you build in the organisation across formal hierarchies, you should be friends from people across the strata, most junior to most senior. This helps you to win people across the organisation and also know what is happening elsewhere in the organisation. When you are friends with people, they tend to help you, not only with information, but also with things that may be new to you or things you may be unfamiliar with.

I had a colleague like that, this person was super friendly and made friends easily and across the organisation. This person was also very helpful and would go out of their way to help people and so used this currency to build relations and also get the gossip from across departments and sections.

 

Be Neutral

At work, it is very easy to get caught up in gossip and eventually end up taking sides. This could misfire horribly. So the best thing to do is to be completely neutral. Even when people rant about other people in front of you, just nod neutrally and move away from there as soon as possible. When you take sides in any issue, it will inevitably come to bite you in the back.

 

Be Objective and professional

When office politics comes to play, personalities are involved and we may be mad at someone or the other. At times like this, maybe you want to vent out to someone and this most likely takes the shape of a gossip and veers to the person’s personal characteristics. Don’t give in to this! Even if you win this war, you will ultimately lose the larger battle.

Be professional in your attitude and your exchanges with your superiors, peers and subordinates at all times. This attitude will pay off in more ways than one.

 

So here you have four ways in which you can play the office politics game and come out a winner. Do you have any more strategies which help in navigating the minefield which is office politics? I’d to hear from you in the comments below.

Chillin in Batam Part 2

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Part 1

 

The South entrance of Nagoya Hill Mall

We dumped our stuff in the hotel room and decided to explore the Nagoya Hill Mall and also grab some lunch since it was almost noon in Batam, which meant it was 1 pm in Singapore and our stomachs were growling with hunger. After asking the hotel reception the best way to the mall, we reached there and entered by what we later learnt was the south entrance. This entrance is right at the small alleyway which houses a number of spas and massage parlours. It was also here that there was an A&W restaurant, but both BB & GG were not interested in the root beer which was no longer available in Singapore. They said they’ve had it before and that it tasted like toothpaste!!

 

 

Food Street on the first floor

We entered the mall and walked to the first floor which was like a food street with many food stalls and restaurants. After walking the length of the food street, we realised we could not eat anywhere as none had vegetarian options and we ended up at Pizza Hut which was our last choice place to eat. There was not much option at Pizza Hut also, so we ended with some pizza, garlic bread, waffles etc which didn’t really fill our stomach.

 

After lunch, we walked around the mall and brought some manga toys for GG, then some fidget spinners for both BB & GG and then while walking, saw a shop selling some fake bags. The children brought some backpacks and I got a fake Longchamp bag. The quality was quite good and for the price (around SGD 10) quite worth it. After that we went to see the theatre, there was just The Mummy and Pirates of the Caribbean running so opted not to see at the moment. Then decided to explore the mall more and went into their anchor department store, Matahari. Since it was the month of Ramadhan, the store was running a lot of promotions and tee shirts were on a buy one get one offer.

Another anchor tenant was a hypermarket called Hypermart where we went next to stock up on water and some snacks and drinks and also check out what was available. After that we were quite knackered, so decided to stop for some coffee for the adults and bubble tea for the children. After this was time to spend money on massages, one of the big reasons to come to Batam. While having coffee, I looked around and saw a spa called Thai Odyssey.

 

A cute elephant at Thai Odyssey Spa

I remember reading some good reviews about Thai Odyssey, which is an upscale spa in Malaysia so decided to do our first massage there. We all wanted a foot massage, so went for the 60 minutes one which cost Rp 180,000 each. They started with washing our legs and then giving us slippers to wear. After that, we were asked to put our bags (except handbags) into a locker, the keys to which was handed to me. Then we were asked to change our bottoms to their own which would help them massage. Then we went to the massage room and they served us some ginger tea after which the actual massage started. We were also offered some eye shades if we wanted to relax. The massage was great but at Batam prices, slightly expensive. We walked back to the hotel to relax a bit before venturing out for dinner.

 

 

The handles in the cupboards at the ‘pantry’ area of our room, which I was very taken up by

Back at the hotel, S rested and slept awhile and the children and I chilled and watched some videos. Sometime slightly before 6 pm, we left to try and find an Indian restaurant I had found was close to the mall. The restaurant is called Taj Indian Delight and I thought we could reach it from the other side of the mall. You exit from the side of J.CO and get out of the mall completely. Walk to Nagoya Hill hotel and at the main road there, turn left. Walk for around 5 minutes and at the traffic light, cross the road. At this point, you see the road turns right. Just follow the road and at this turning, you see the restaurant. We had a nice Indian meal there. All of us took the Bombay Meal which included one chapati, a huge bowl of rice, a small cup of aloo jeera, a soup bowl full of Dal fry, a soup bowl full of chana masala and a papad. They also gave us a small cup of mango ginger pickle. The portions were quite generous and the meal came to approximately SGD 6 per person, inclusive of a drink each.

 

The next day, all of us woke up early despite being on a holiday and so went for an early breakfast which was a big disappointment to us. We know that usually in hotel buffet breakfasts, we can probably eat around 30% of the food available, but here, we could eat less than 10% given that there was hardly any options which were vegetarian friendly.

We reached the mall around 10 am and started looking for a spa which seemed wallet friendly. We chanced upon Eksa Spa and Wellness which also had good reviews on Trip Advisor and so when we went in and checked, we found the rates for a massage seemed reasonable and so S and I did the deep tissue massage for one hour. The price stated was Rp 170,000 per person which became Rp 187,000 per person when they added the taxes. During the massage, we had to disrobe except for underwear and they give women a sarong to wear while guys get a pair of pants. The massage area is actually a screened-off area and we got the ‘couple room’. The massage started with some dry massage and then the therapist started using some oil to do really deep and hard massage. It was quite good and after the massage, we were given some delicious ginger tea.

Post massage we went into the mall and looked for a nail place for BB and me to do a pedicure. Found one near the movie theatre. The cost for a classic pedicure was Rp 98,000 per person and while we were doing it, the boys went to find out the next show timing and then play some arcade games nearby. After the pedicure, we went to look for them and it was time for lunch which we did at the same Indian place we had dinner. After lunch, we decided to go and see The Mummy. We had two Rp 30,000 vouchers from Matahari from the previous day so this meant two tickets were free and we only paid Rp 60,000 for four movie tickets (SGD 1.50 per person). We were tired by the time the movie ended, but I didn’t want to go back to the hotel because knowing myself, I wouldn’t come back if I did that. So I decided to go for a facial and before that we finished all our shopping. GG decided to wait for me while BB and S went back to the hotel to keep back the things.

I did the facial at Eksa again. It was some whitening and hydrating facial for dry skin. The therapist started with cleansing my face and then a scrub was applied. After that, she applied some toner and then used some vacuum thingy to suck the pores and blackheads. I have like a gazillion pores and blackheads and this was not painful at all. She then next extracted the blackheads using the blackhead extractor and I can say she was quite skilled as I hardly felt any pain at all. I am usually in tears at this point in a facial and there are times I want to ask the therapist to just give up and that I will live with the blackheads. But she did it in such a way it didn’t pain at all, even at the most which is the worst area. Next she toned it and started massaging my face which was quite wonderful. After the massage was some sort of a metal which she said was a high frequency machine. After this she put in a mask and waited for it to dry. While drying, she also massaged my neck and shoulders. After the mask dried, she peeled it off and then applied serum and moisturiser. Then a drink of ginger tea and I was done.

After dinner at the Indian restaurant again and a leisurely walk back to the hotel, we asked our hotel reception to see if we could change our ferry tickets to an earlier one. This was because our helper was sick in Singapore and I wanted to go earlier to see if she needed to see a doctor. I had taken her to the doctor before our trip, but during my daily calls to her, she still sounded sick, hence the decision to go earlier. We were told we would have to pay Rp 30,000 per person since they had already issued the boarding pass to us when we booked online. Initially we were not sure, but the next day, we decided to go ahead with paying the fee and leaving earlier.

On our last day in Batam, we went back to the mall after a slightly late breakfast and brought some o their famous layer cakes and honeycomb cakes to take back home. Then came back to the hotel and after making sure we had left nothing, checked out and took a hotel taxi to the ferry terminal. The process to change the boarding passes at the ferry terminal was quite simple and since we still had an hour to boarding, we decided to check out the mall next to the terminal to catch a bite to eat before boarding. The ferry going back home was a single decker one and we sat in the back. Our bags were kept in the luggage rack at the entrance of the ferry and I was a bit worried about them since it was not locked and Singapore has very strict drug laws and so made some check the luggage periodically. So that ended our two day holiday in Batam. I am quite tempted to make day trips there, especially to do some spa treatments as they are cheap compared to Singapore as well as shop in the hypermarkets where some household goods and toiletries are a real steal if compared to stores here.

Casual Racism: We are all guilty of this one!

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We are all racists at some point in time or the other!

Did the above line shock you? Did you just tell yourself that you are no racist? I am sure all of us believe ourselves to be free from any racist tendencies, but the truth is that we are unconsciously racist at times, even when we say we are not. There’s a term for this sort of racism. This is now called ‘Casual Racism’

So what is casual racism? It’s a subtle form of racism against family or friends when you ridicule them because of who they are when you make assumptions about a group of people because of the way they look or speak and use those assumptions for everyone associated with that group. It’s everyday racism and is so commonplace and normalised that the person who does it, is not even aware that he/she is making comments what may hurt the person being trolled!

So why this topic today? It came up because, over the last few days, an incident shared by a Singaporean Indian has blown up so much over various social media. What happened was this person, who is an actor went to audition for a role in a popular movie franchise which is based on Singapore’s National Service and at the audition was asked to speak with an exaggerated Indian accent (think Apu in the Simpsons). When he commented that the accent he spoke in was how a normal Singaporean Indian spoke, he was told they wanted it to be more Indian and so funny. He took to social media to comment on this and also said he felt like an outsider in his whole country. The truth is that no one in Singapore who is of Indian descent speaks like that and even in India, especially in the bigger cities, people don’t speak with these exaggerated accents and gestures. This may have been true some 40-50 years back, but today most Indians have had an English language education and speak mostly normally (some accent is given because everyone has an accent from where they come).

The incident has been shared many thousands of times and has pretty much polarised the country. On one hand, you have the minorities who speak of having such incidents happen to them constantly and on the other hand, you have the majority slam the actor by saying since it was an acting job, he should just do what the director asks him to do and that he is being sensitive to implied slurs on him because of his race.

But the truth is that living in a multicultural country like Singapore, a minority is always subjected to race-related jokes and other incidents which happen to them on an almost daily basis. So much so, we always just take them into our stride or just shrug them off. I remember, when I first moved to Singapore, people of the majority race (mostly the elderly) would prefer to stand in public transport rather than sit in the empty seat next to me just because I am an Indian and they think all Indians smell! It used to hurt me a lot initially since this was the first time I had been exposed to something like this, but over the years, I’ve built up a shell and have learnt to let it slide.

Least you think India is not racist, let me disabuse you of that notion. Racism exists there too but is much more subtle. There, it’s because of the way a group of people look or speak. So you have the Punjabi Sikh Santa Banta jokes, the notion that all Biharis are thugs and illiterates and that everyone from the northeastern part of India behaves in a certain way.  You also have the bashing of North Indian/UP migrants in Mumbai because some of the locals believe they are out to snatch their jobs and because of India’s obsession with fair skin, people from South India are looked down upon. This is worse for those who come from the African continent to live and work in India and news reports are aplenty for those who want to know more about these instances.

I could go on and on about instances of casual racism, but I need to stop somewhere. Research has shown that racism, and even, or especially casual racism has a range of harmful effects on those targeted, including limiting access to employment, health services and education and reduced workplace productivity and has been linked to mental and physical health problems, particularly depression and anxiety.

So the next time you make an off colour joke or comment or even reduce a group of people to common tendencies, take a minute and think. If the situation was reversed, would you like to be the butt of such jokes or comments?

Here are some links which explain much more about casual  racism:

10 Signs you might be a racist; Casual Racism Is Not “Bants”; It Stops With Me; Quora

What do you think of such instances of racism? Has something like this happened to you? Please comment and let me know…